Mysterium
by FidgeyTova
Summary: Most Zweilts grow up together, unfortunately, Shusei's reincarnated soul was lost and Hotsuma lives the life of a normal student. Will they remember the truth about themselves or will the mistakes of the past keep them separated?
1. Chapter 1

**Hi everyone!**

**Ok…where to begin?... **I havent done a story in... years? **  
**

**I've had this story on my computer for so long. I figured, why waste it, so I'll put it here.**

**So here goes my attempt at a multi chapter fic. Obviously this is a slight AU taking place in a circus-like environment. And since my two favorite characters are reincarnated multiple times, what a perfect opportunity to do it!  
**

**Although, if this idea doesn't work out, I'll take it down.**

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1

Cheers erupt through the tent as the crowd rises, delighted at what they had just witnessed. Animals are sent in to frenzy from the sudden noise, but calmed by their masters.

The lights are glaring down towards the brightly colored stage. All different types of people gather to the large, round center platform, gathering around a young brunet.

It always ends the same way, loud clapping and people standing and cheering. There, in the middle of the ring alongside his fellow actors and actresses, Shusei stands, waving at the crowd, a fake smile on his face.

_How did it come to this?_

He asked himself this many times.

And he always comes to the same conclusion.

He never had a choice.

It took a few minutes for the clapping and cheering to die down. Shusei can hear the excited chatter from the kids who were talking about how amazing the performances were. The audience slowly disappears from the tent, leaving behind empty seats and garbage. Once the paying patrons were all gone, the workers begin to fill up the tent and start cleaning up the ring while all the performers went their separate ways, the smiles fading from their faces.

Shusei is left alone again. He turns to exit the tent but stops when he sees a figure approach. A tall man, well dressed in a suit, comes forward. He places a hand on Shusei's shoulder to stop the boy from leaving before he could say anything.

"You did well again." He says, not necessarily in a complementing way. The man's cold touch sent shivers down Shusei's back.

"Thank you." He didn't mean it. Shusei never spoke unnecessarily to the man. If he asks a question, he answers it simply.

"You don't look well."

Did he really care? Shusei doesn't think so.

"Just need to rest."

The man taps his shoulder twice, a way of telling Shusei he is free to go.

The man saunters away slowly, pulling a cigar out of his pocket and not sparing Shusei another glance. Shusei watches him carefully out of the corner of his eye until he is out of sight.

When the darkness of the tent overtakes him, Shusei walks over to the exit and pulls the cover of the tent aside and walks out on to the grounds. People are scarce now, just a few performers and tourists left. A few patrons stood in front of booths, entertained by circus folk, throwing money at them to continue playing games. Others are gathered around in groups looking on as performers show off tricks they didn't perform at the show.

Shusei hates it. This lifestyle. The fraud.

He needs to be alone.

He walks through the grounds ignoring the people around him. After doing this so many times, he is very good at tuning out the obnoxious noises of games and gossip. It was dark with the only light guiding his path being cast by lanterns, strung lights, and the moon and stars. There are brown tents covering the area that is now off limits to customers, the temporary homes of the performers and workers. Performers are privileged with the bigger tents, while the workers share smaller ones. Shusei has a large tent to himself, though he doesn't understand the need for such a big tent. He has nothing anyway. All the tents are made to be easily collapsible, and everything is portable. The cirque travels lightly; they never stay for very long in one place.

The circus grounds are laid out like a maze, which he navigates with ease. He passes by numerous, brightly colored banners and more tents, many displaying the cirques logo and some displaying acts and performer names. They are outlined by stringed lights casting strange, colorful shadows across the cirque grounds. He passes by one banner, dedicated to him. On the banner he was wearing the ringmaster uniform, the one he happens to be wearing now, showing his trademark false smile, and with one arm outstretched, invitingly. Shusei hates seeing it, he doesn't like feeling so exposed, and looks away immediately.

Shusei walks towards the back of the grounds. Here is where the trucks are parked. The trucks are dirty, large and unmarked. But they serve their purpose of moving the supplies well.

He passes the last of the trucks past a weak barricade and is now off cirque grounds. He's just far enough to where the lights aren't as bright and the remaining voices are muted. Shusei is surrounded by trees and, feeling secure, he finds a log to sit on and lets his head rest in his hands.

He looks through narrowed eyes, through his fingers and sees the brightly colored clothing. A green, tuxedo-like, swallow tail jacket with gold trim. Underneath it is a black vest over a white button down shirt. He wore black and dark gray horizontally striped pants. Black boots, with a rim that mimics the gold trim of the jacket. His choice of clothing, as a ringmaster, is modest. The cirque owner tried convincing him to go with a more extravagant outfit. Shusei wasn't interested and since then, stuck with a more reserved garb.

He despises the uniform.

_But…it's better than nothing, right?_

Shusei came from nothing. He doesn't remember much about his family or if he had any friends. According to _him_, he was abandoned.

But then _he _came, the owner of the cirque. He made a deal with the owner. Shusei works and he is given a place to stay. A place to sleep at night, food, and most importantly…

A purpose.

Shusei never felt like he had a place to belong. Shusei never had a place to call home.

Home became the _Cirque __Mystērium_. A traveling show, not quite a normal circus and not quite a freak show. It was somewhere in between the two, a show unique unto its own. There are no clowns with disgustingly bright faces or cute little animals. This circus has an interesting macabre twist. Most presentations are dangerous and can potentially kill a performer. Even Shusei has had a close encounter with death once or twice.

Shusei's relationship with the other performers is unusual. They're like friends and also like family, yet everyone does their best to keep to themselves. They're there when they are needed by another. Most of the performers and workers, are like Shusei, they had nothing and wanted a purpose. But of course, there were the few who had come here of their own free will, though Shusei can't see why.

Having grown up in the circus, the owner had trained Shusei in all of the arts typically seen at a one, plus many others. Knife throwing, illusions, even fire breathing.

Shusei laughs, probably to cover up his own embarrassment and shame. But as ringmaster, it is essential he know all this.

But these stunts aren't what make him sought out.

His specialty, above all else, is fortune telling.

His customers would enter a small secluded room, dimly lit, with just enough light to illuminate their faces. The faint light of the room gently shines off the crystal ball in the center of the table. Shusei asks a few, key questions that hint at a person's personality, and he goes from there.

It's a game to him, albeit not an enjoyable one, but he's very good at it and the cirque owner is always pleased at the amount of money fortune-telling brings in.

People always ask him questions about their future. Naturally, he had no way of knowing what would happen to the person, whether they'd find love or become rich, but at times he could see pieces of their past, their memories.

When he first realized this, it had shocked him. He could see images of what people had gone through, almost like a movie playing out in his mind. Shusei had no idea how it happened or what triggered it, or even if he had any control over it. They were a frightening experience, so he tries his best to hide it. He knows this is something that could be exploited, especially in his line of work. Shusei has to hide it at all costs, especially from the cirque owner.

But after experiencing the visions so often, he got used to them, and he realized how it can help him. Seeing tiny fragments of their past aided in his talent. Saying things the customers weren't expecting to hear and it being true gave him credibility. Then all he has to say is what they want to hear and they're happy.

Because if this power, Shusei had become quite popular. But Shusei thinks he's a freak or a monster. Even so, he gets lines of people wanting to know every little detail of their life. He probably should be happy about it, but he's not. He can't believe how gullible the people are. Can't they tell it's all a lie?

Or maybe, he just became a good liar.

He hates to take advantage of people like this, but he doesn't have a choice. The minute his usefulness runs out, he won't be needed and he'll be all alone again.

Shusei took in a deep breath and let it out slowly in a poor attempt to rid himself of all his anxiety.

He looks up and a small sad smile appears. The stars are bright tonight and thousands of them cover the sky for as far as he can see. Shusei likes looking at the stars. They made him feel at peace with how softly they filled the night sky with their pure light. A gentle breeze whistles through the trees only adding to the tranquility.

Shusei's smile fades, returning to a look of indifference. If he allows himself to get caught up in these moments, it will only make it harder to return to his _real_ life. His life of loneliness and grief. He doesn't expect good things to happen nor does he want them. If he had a good life…

He would only be afraid he'd lose it.

And _that_ was something he couldn't go through.

_Being all alone…With nothing…No one…_

Shusei's head is still turned up towards the sky, but he slowly and reluctantly tares his gaze away from the stars and looks over in the direction of the cirque.

The lights begin to go out, one by one, from the grounds and the area has gotten quiet. With one final sigh, he lifts himself up and staggers a bit. Shusei puts the back of his hand to his forehead. He feels a little feverish but passes it off as being tired from the show.

He slowly makes his way back, prolonging every minute he wasn't back at the cirque. Shusei is exhausted, whether it is from the long days of traveling and the shows, or his depressing thoughts about his life. He could barely lift his feet up high enough off the ground to avoid tripping over branches and rocks.

Shusei barely remembers the walk back. The next time he looks up, he sees the rows of dark tents. All but one has their lights off. Shusei walks towards the only lit tent.

He pulls aside the tent's entrance and enters. Only a small lamp next to his bed illuminates the whole tent. For what it's worth, his place is large enough to be comfortable in. All he has is a bed, a few shelves with books, a dresser for some normal, casual clothes, his performing outfits are held in another tent, and in the corner is a small upright piano. The piano is covered in a thin layer of dust. Shusei hasn't played it in a while and even when he wants to, the motivation isn't there. He wonders why he has it all.

Shusei took off the jacket of his costume and threw it in the corner. He doesn't care if it gets wrinkled or dirty, especially now that their last string of shows in this area has ended.

He walks over to his bed and doesn't bother to pull the covers aside. He just falls on top and loosens the ribbon around his neck and turns off the light.

Shusei's eyes feel heavy and his body feels numb. Tomorrow was going to be a busy day and he is already dreading it. The troupe will be packing everything up and move to a new location for their next line of performances. It is a new location for the cirque, a place where they haven't done shows in years because it is dangerous for them. The police never approve of the cirque and on a few occasions, shut down their show, claiming it to be illegal and hazardous for performers and audience alike. In the end, the police's authority was not enough and the cirque would perform again. But their next destination will be sure to bring in lots on money, and most likely, catch the attention of police.

He lets out one last sigh.

Shusei doesn't care where they go to next. To him it was all the same.

"…Tokyo…"

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**It's so fun to imagine characters we have seen in anime and manga in a whole new environment. And how to keep them in character while they go through such different experiences. Shusei in particular is so much fun to write about, probably because he's a bit of an introvert.  
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**I've got about nine or ten chapters written out. I myself have to reread them considering I haven't seen this story in forever. If this story does good and gets reviews, I'll keep updating. So let me know!  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**So, here's the next chapter!**

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2

Hotsuma lets out a yawn as he walks to school, still half asleep. He rubs his eyes, cussing about wanting to go back to sleep. His bad habit of playing video games late into the night is beginning to catch up to him. His blond hair is untidy and his purple tie is messily tied and the slightly wrinkled gray school uniform finishes the look. His multiple earrings give him a rebellious look. When Hotsuma finally reaches the outside of the school, he dreads the start of classes. A few other classmates are kind enough to wish him a good morning, which he rudely ignores. He doesn't really know most of the people in his school. He has a few friends and as far as he's concerned, that is all he needs.

"Morning, Hotsuma."

Hotsuma turns around only after recognizing the voice.

The kind voice came from a silver haired boy, wearing the same color tie as he is. Behind him is a pretty, long haired girl also wearing the same school uniform only with a red tie, signifying she is a year ahead of the two boys. They are the Murasame siblings, Hotsuma's two good friends.

"Didn't sleep well again, huh?" The girl, Toko, asked. Even she knows the cause of his insomnia is the video games.

Hotsuma grumbles a response.

"How's everything going?" Tsukumo asked.

"Same as always…"

The school bell rings breaking their conversation and made the three students hurry to their first class. Toko goes to her homeroom leaving behind her brother and Hotsuma who rush to their classroom.

The two boys take their seats, right next to each other.

Tsukumo looks towards Hotsuma. He notices the blond's hair was messier than it usually is and sees dark circles under his eyes.

"Hotsuma, you don't look so good, are you sure you're ok?"

"I'm fine."

"But, you-"

"I said I'm fine, Tsukumo."

Tsukumo drops the subject. There is no point in arguing with someone as stubborn as Hotsuma, especially one so tired and irritable.

Hotsuma looks over at Tsukumo. He knows he's lucky to have a friend like Tsukumo, especially with how he prefers to keep people at a distance. He saw only concern in the boy's eyes and he wants to apologize for his tone. But as everyone knows, apologies don't come easy from Hotsuma.

"It's alright, Hotsuma. I understand." Tsukumo smiles. It was very rare to see Tsukumo angry or flustered.

Hotsuma blushes. _Damn that boy! Is he a freaking mind reader or something?!_

Tsukumo holds in a chuckle. Hotsuma sees the smirk on Tsukumo's face, but decides not to say anything.

"Hmph!" He looks away from the kind, silver haired boy.

Hotsuma turns his attention to the front of the classroom, expecting to see their homeroom teacher, who apparently, still hasn't arrived. He glances toward the window instead. It was an overcast day, appropriate, considering his lousy mood. He let out a sigh, which causes Tsukumo to look at his friend.

Tsukumo doesn't want to keep nagging him for fear of pushing him away. Tsukumo and his sister always have to be careful to find the right balance between being there for Hotsuma and knowing when to leave him alone but it's hard to see a friend suffer.

_If only we could tell him the truth…_

The teacher walks into the room and Tsukumo quickly prepares for class, unlike Hotsuma who continues to stare out the window.

...

"We are almost there, Shusei. Will you be ready by tomorrow night?"

Shusei looks over to the driver, his boss and cirque owner.

"Well? You still look paler than usual." He laughs to himself.

"I'll be fine."

"Heh, we'll see how much longer you can go before exhausting yourself."

For Shusei, it is hard to tell if he really means it and wants to see him collapse or if it is a warning.

Shusei keeps a steady gaze on the man from the corner of his eye.

Ryuu Tanaka is the man's name. His age shows through the way he carries himself and speaks. His thin hair is white and combed back and he is always seen in a suit. He has been the owner of the circus for as long as Shusei's known him. He is usually a quiet man and from the outside appears to be nice, but to everyone who knows him, especially those at the cirque, his demeanor is laced with spite. When he is angry, everyone does their best to avoid him.

Shusei looks away from the man and looks at the side view mirror of the truck. He sees the other trucks carrying the cirque supplies in tow.

"As soon as we've found the spot to set up, make sure everyone gets their jobs done. We don't have much time to prepare and we are only staying a few days. Two shows and that's it. We'll pack again and move before the Tokyo police find us. Understood?"

"Yes."

"I've been discreetly promoting the show, trying to avoid the bastards who want to shut us down. Otherwise, it should be a big turn out." He seems to be talking to himself.

"…"

"Make sure the performers have practiced enough but are also well rested." Tanaka adds.

"Alright." Shusei automatically answers.

It's quiet in the truck for a few minutes. Tanaka looks over at Shusei and stares at him, "Damn, you're boring…"

Shusei hides a smirk. He won't go against Tanaka's orders, but he doesn't try to make his life easy either.

They are driving on a back road, well hidden from most of the population of Tokyo and lucky enough to have gone undetected by police. They pass by a few clearings that would have been suitable for the show, but not good enough for Tanaka's taste. He always expects perfection, which makes Shusei's, and the other worker's, lives more difficult.

After a few more clearings passed by, Tanaka found the perfect place for the shows setting. It is just big enough to comfortably contain all the tents and is completely surrounded by trees.

Without waiting for orders from Tanaka, Shusei hops out of the truck and immediately went around the back to begin unloading supplies.

He opens the back of the truck and holds in a groan. There is a lot of stuff that needs to be unpacked and most of the supplies fell over and had made a mess in the truck

Tanaka appears behind Shusei, lighting a cigar. The man loved cigars and was never caught without one, "Get everything set up. Work all night if you have to." He walks away, leaving Shusei with all the work.

Shusei sighs and gets in the truck and begins working, preparing for the next show.

...

The school day couldn't have gone by quick enough for Hotsuma. Between falling asleep or staring out the window, he has no idea what any of today's lessons were about. He's just thankful it's the weekend.

"What's with the scowl, Renjou?"

Hotsuma turns around. It's a student wearing a purple tie. His name is Kazuki, a member of the school's basketball team. Hotsuma is also a member of the basketball team. He joined the team about two months ago and already gained a reputation as a great basketball player. He enjoys the sport, but lately, he thinks of the game more as a distraction.

"Well?" Kazuki asks again when Hotsuma didn't respond.

"It's nothing." Hotsuma turns away from his classmate and begins to walk home.

"Hey, where ya going?" Kazuki grabs him by the shoulder and spins him around, "Hold on a second! A few members of the team are going out Saturday night, wanna join?"

"Not really." Hotsuma says in an uninterested tone, which Kazuki either didn't pick up on or just ignored.

"Aw, come on! You're a part of the team, but we hardly ever see you besides games and practice!" Kazuki pleads, "Just one night won't kill ya!"

Hotsuma wasn't good friends with any of his teammates, so he doesn't really understand Kazuki's offer, "I'm not interested." Hotsuma, becoming impatient, turned his tone into a growl of annoyance.

Kazuki saw Hotsuma's growing irritation, "Alright, alright…" He steps back to give Hotsuma room, "Well…Katsu got a few tickets to some…freak show or something…He, Osamu, Yuu, and I were gonna go. Just…let me know if you change your mind." Kazuki walks away feeling defeated.

Hotsuma groans. He feels like he's making everyone worry today. First Tsukumo, now Kazuki. Kazuki is a nice guy and one night with him and a few team members won't hurt. After all, if it weren't for Kazuki, he wouldn't even be a part of the team. It was Kazuki who invited him to join, probably because he felt bad for Hotsuma, who always looked lonely.

And what was Hotsuma going to do over the weekend anyway?

"Uh…Hey, Kazuki…" Hotsuma says just loud enough for Kazuki to hear.

Judging by Hotsuma face, the other boy already saw he accepted the offer, bringing a small smile to his face, "Yeah?"

"I guess…one night won't hurt." Hotsuma looks down at his feet as he says it. His acceptance is his form of an apology. He'll be damned if just says 'I'm sorry.'

"Awesome!" Kazuki ran back to Hotsuma, excited that he was going to join the group, "The show is right on the outskirts of Tokyo, just past the woods." Kazuki points in the corresponding direction.

_Tsukumo and Toko live that way… _Hotsuma thought, not knowing why that came up, "So, uh…What's the name of this thing?"

"_Cirque Mystērium_…I never heard of it before, but according to Osamu, it's an illegal show so that would probably explain why most people don't know of it."

Hotsuma doesn't care for circuses. The idea of going usually doesn't sound fun, but the thought of some _illegal_ circus performing right outside Tokyo does sound a little intriguing.

"You know the trail that cuts through the woods right?" Kazuki continued, "That's where we'll all meet up at 10 o' clock at night, right by the entrance. Katsu will give out our tickets there."

"Alright."

"The show starts at 10:30. Hope that isn't past your bedtime!" Kazuki jokes and runs off. He turns around and yells towards Hotsuma, "Glad you're coming, Renjou! See ya then!"

Hotsuma watches the boy run off and after a few seconds decides to make his way home. This won't be the weekend he's been anticipating, but Hotsuma figures it's better than staying home alone.

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**Thank you to Yuumon2, Tess, Giogiu, Yuu-chan, and Deaththekid1998 for your reviews! It's been nearly 3 years since I've uploaded anything and was hesitant to upload this story at all, so your reviews were so nice! Thanks again! **


	3. Chapter 3

**My early Christmas gift to you all, a new chapter!** **Enjoy!**

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3

It wasn't until early morning that everything was set up. Since they aren't staying here long, a lot of personal items are left packed in the trucks. Shusei has a few books out on his nightstand in case he finds a moment to himself. Immediately after everything was set up and put into place and Tanaka had approved, Shusei collapses in his bed; more like a cot than a bed. His tent was mostly empty.

He lies in his bed and puts the back of his hand to his forehead. He let out an exasperated breath when it still feels warm. The last thing he needs now is a fever.

He rolls over to his side and closes his eyes, trying to lose himself in unconsciousness.

….

The sound of an alarm clock goes off, and a fist harshly falls down on it to silence it. Hotsuma lazily looks over to the clock. 11:24. Seeing that it's almost noon he drops his face back into its pillow instead of getting up. He wants to fall back asleep to make up for all the missed sleep from having to go to school, plus another night spent playing a video game doesn't help.

Remembering that tonight is the night of the circus he's been invited to, he gets a little energy and sits up in bed. Hotsuma still can't believe he was talked in to this.

_I feel like a damn kid…_

He doesn't hurry out of bed. He has nothing to do today until the show late at night.

Hotsuma wonders what he'll see tonight.

_The whole thing is probably a joke. Smoke and mirrors…_

But another part of Hotsuma wonders…

What if it _is_ real?

Hotsuma lets out a pathetic laugh for having thought that.

….

_It's pitch black._

_Shusei stands in a clearing, steadfast with his hands balled into fists. He's shaking but whether out of fear or anger, he isn't sure. _

_Across from him is a tall elegant and yet feral man with silver eyes. Behind him are two wolf like beasts, black fur with red eyes and baring their long, sharp fangs. _

"_Tell me, Zweilt, " He says in a sarcastic tone, "How does it feel to be abandoned?"_

_Shusei doesn't answer, and when the silver eyed man grows tired of Shusei's silence, he holds up a hand, an indication to the two dogs they recognize as a signal to kill._

_Shusei can't move…_

_Or maybe he doesn't want to._

What's the point, anyway?'

_One beast's jaws latches on to Shusei's throat and pierces down with all its might. As blood begins dripping down his neck and breathing became near impossible, the other wolf dug its claws into his stomach._

_Shusei could barely let out a scream and before he knew it, the world went black as the sound of sadistic laughter fills the air._

…

Shusei awoke with a start, letting out deep labored breaths.

_What…what was that? A dream?_

He felt his body for any signs of injury. When he realizes he hasn't been attacked his hand rests on his head again. He's burning up with a fever.

_That dream…it was probably just the fever._

Shusei felt like the world was swaying and, even while sitting, couldn't orientate himself.

_This isn't good._

Whether it is bad or good, he wasn't going to complain to anyone about it.

He swings his legs over the side of his bed and firmly set them on the floor. He gets up slowly to avoid any added dizziness and grabs on to the desk beside his bed for support. When Shusei thinks he's safe, he lets go.

Shusei wobbles a little bit but manages to stand. He sees his coat lying in the corner and slowly walks over to pick it up. He puts it on and tries to smooth out the wrinkles. It doesn't look great and Tanaka will probably scold him for it after the show, but he puts it out of his mind for now.

Shusei pulls up his sleeve and looks at his watch. His eyes open widely in shock.

_I slept all day!_

It's 10:20 at night. He only has a few minutes before the show.

"I've got to hurry." His voice cracks. He can't believe how badly he feels and sounds now. He shouldn't be performing in this condition. Shusei sees a bottle of water next to his bed that he left there last night after unpacking. He hurriedly drinks it all. It doesn't make him feel better like he hoped, but he has no choice now. Shusei runs out of his tent and rushes over to where the show will begin in just a few minutes.

….

Hotsuma leaves little early to make sure he meets up with the others on time. He doesn't bring anything with him other than his cell phone in his pocket and a little bit of money. On the way there, he found Kazuki, and the two walk together to the meeting place. Katsu, Osamu and Yuu are already there waiting for the others. Hotsuma doesn't know the other three too well, so he stuck by Kazuki's side.

Osamu gave Hotsuma his ticket.

He examines it carefully, still thinking this whole thing is a joke. He doesn't notice the others leaving until Kazuki taps his shoulder, "Come on! Let's go!"

They continue to walk further into the forest, almost losing their way a few times. About twenty minutes pass before they find the dim lights of the circus grounds. The whole place is blocked off by a fence except for a booth at the entrance where a worker was waiting to take tickets. The group walks up to the booth and hands their tickets to the silent man. When he receives all their tickets, he waves his hand, telling them to enter.

It is like stepping into a whole new world. There are people all around, playing games, eating candy, and shopping. It is noisy but being hidden in the trees is enough to contain the sound of the circus. It is mostly dark unless near a tent or booth, but by now Hotsuma's eyes are used to the dark and he no longer had a hard time seeing.

Everything is brightly colored, but years of wear faded the color a bit, giving the cirque an antique look. The only things up to date are the banners portraying the current actors. The sound of music is heard throughout the cirque grounds, the usual music one would hear in a circus. To Hotsuma, it sounds like a high pitched train. According to Osamu, the musical instrument is called a calliope, an instrument comprised of musical whistles that were originally used train whistles.

Hotsuma looks all around, taking in all the sights the cirque had to offer. He was relieved to see it wasn't a typical children's show. There is an atmosphere to this circus that felt a little mature, more dangerous. This feeling lifts Hotsuma's mood.

"Hey, there are games here! Let's play a few!" Yuu said running towards the games and away from the group. He stopped in front of what looks like a shooting game. The booth is lined with cheap prizes.

"We don't have time! The show will start soon!" Osamu pulled Yuu back from the games.

"Show?" Hotsuma turns to Kazuki.

"Oh, he didn't tell ya?" Kazuki said blankly, "This cirque has an awesome event with fire breathers and contortionists and stuff!"

"Hmm…"

"Fine! After the show, let's play though!" Yuu was more interested in the games than the show.

"Alright!"

"Hey, there's cotton candy!" Katsu said. Osamu sighs, knowing the night will be like this.

Kazuki laughs, "Osamu, you're like the parent!"

Once everyone was gathered together, they all decide to head for the main tent. The big brightly colored tent in the middle is where the performances take place. There is a line outside but people are quickly being ushered in. They only had to wait ten minutes before being seated.

They end up sitting in a middle row, so their view of the stage is good. Hotsuma has an end seat, which he likes. Kazuki was sitting next to him.

Inside the tent, the center of the tent is brightly lit, but everyone in the audience is in shadow. In the middle is a large round stage in the center with two smaller ones on either side. The age and wear on the stage and equipment is evident and half of it doesn't look safe. Large poles are placed around the rings to act as both support for the tent and for the tight ropes and swings. Hotsuma doesn't see any safety nets.

"This should be good! What do you think, Renjou?" He asks Hotsuma. Kazuki is like a little kid with his excitement towards the upcoming show.

"Yeah." He answers still unsure of the whole thing.

"Did ya have a hard time sneaking out? My parents are gonna pissed if they find out." Kazuki laughs, unaffected by the scolding he will most likely receive.

"Nah. They won't notice I'm gone." Hotsuma said with an air of disdain.

Kazuki saw Hotsuma's demeanor change and worried that he said something he shouldn't have, "Sorry…if I said something I shouldn't ha-"

"No!" Hotsuma didn't mean to upset Kazuki, "My parents are always gone. They're always away on business."

"Oh…"

"It's no big deal!" Hotsuma pipes up, not wanting to ruin the fun, "It's fine, really!"

Most people aren't aware of Hotsuma's home life, other than Tsukumo and his sister. Aside from his parents, he lives comfortably in a large home. His appearance and attitude however, would never hint at his personal life. Both of his parent's are businessmen, and are very wealthy. While Hotsuma lives almost luxuriously, he feels like he has no family.

The two are interrupted by the dimming of the lights. The tent stays quiet for a moment and then a spotlight appeared on the center stage, which remains empty. A few people begin whispering to their neighbors about the show and what is going to happen next.

"Allow me to personally thank each and every member of the audience…" A voice echoes in the dark tent.

Hotsuma perks up at the sound of the voice. A voice that sounds forced with an underlying hint of sadness and shame.

A figured appears in the light.

Hotsuma strains his eyes to get a better look at the host.

It wasn't an old man, like Hotsuma had expected. In his mind, a ringmaster was an old gentleman with years and years of experience in the circus industry. Rather, the person standing center stage was a boy his age. A boy who should be in school, not traveling with some freak show. The boy looks fatigued and near collapsing, but putting on a brave face for the crowd. People begin cheering at the sight of a performer.

_Can't they see the strain in the boy's face? _ Hostuma wonders.

The boy wears a wrinkled green jacket over a vest with pinstripe pants tucked into a pair of boots. His short brown hair was a little messy. But the more he spoke the stronger he was getting.

The boy ran his fingers through his hair, like he had heard Hotsuma's thoughts.

"Thank you everyone for joining us here tonight." He spoke confidently to the crowd. Hotsuma cringed at the thought of standing up in front of so many people to speak. Either this boy was confident or just very use to this routine, "I will be your host and ringmaster for the night!"

"Tonight, we have prepared a great show for you all. Amazing performances that will leave you breathless. But rather than boring you with a speech, I'll introduce our first performer." He continues.

"Our first act will be performed by Steele," The boy begins to walk off stage but abruptly turns back to the crowd, "Ah, yes!" He was reminded, "I must insist that nobody…Nobody, try any of what you are about to see." He puts a sarcastic smile back on his face and walks off the stage.

Bored by the name of the performer, Hotsuma's eyes follow the boy until he is out of sight. The crowds' cheers for the first performer pulls his attention back towards the stage.

He is a tall thin man dressed casually in black pants and a button down shirt. Despite his young appearance, he has gray hair that is combed neatly black. He couldn't be over 30 years old. He carries with him two long, thin swords.

Hotsuma rests his chin on his hands and he stares blankly at the stage.

The man puts his arms in the air to gain attention and begins giving a brief history on his act, sword swallowing.

"Sword swallowing is a dying art due to its danger. In order to successfully do this, one must train three gag reflexes and be able to remain calm, which is obviously difficult to do. The sword passes closely to the heart and aorta, which if cut, will cause massive bleeding and death."

Hotsuma listens to the man and the more he speaks about the dangers, the more intrigued he becomes.

"But, enough talk!" Steele says, "Time to show you what sword swallowing is all about!" He lifts one of the blades above his head with the point above his throat and pulls it down in front of his stomach to show the audience how far the blade will go once inside. Steele lifts the sword and brings it to his mouth and carefully licks the length of the blade. Once again he holds the blade above his head, opens his mouth, and inserts the sword. It slowly goes into his body and once all the way in, he lets go of it and holds his arms out. A few seconds later he quickly pulls the sword out, giving the crowd a chance to applaud.

He performs the trick a few more times. The ringmaster brings out several swords which Steele swallows all at once. When the sword swallower left the stage the audience cheered loudly.

"That was crazy!" Said one of the boys, Hotsuma can't tell who over the noise.

The boy walks on stage again, gesturing with his hands for quiet.

The ringmaster continued to introduce the next acts. After performances by jugglers, contortionists, knife-throwers, lion tamer, and more, the ringmaster appeared once more on the stage, completely worn out and ghostly pale, "I'm sorry to say that that is all for tonight's show! Thank you so much for coming this evening, perhaps we will see you all at another show!"

Hotsuma was happy to confirm his earlier hunch that there were no clowns in this type of circus. Kazuki nudges Hotsuma's shoulder interrupting the ringmaster, "That was pretty awesome, wasn't it? I'm gonna have to try some of those stunts!"

"That's dangerous! You'll kill yourself, Kazuki!" Osamu overheard.

Hotsuma wasn't paying attention to the two. He listened to the young ringmaster's voice as he begins telling people to exit the tents. He hears the others getting up and decides to follow their lead.

"Now let's go check out the games!" Yuu said while rushing out of the tent.

Osamu and Katsu follow him out of the tent. Kazuki looks over his shoulder and calls for Hotsuma, "Ya coming?"

"Uh…yeah." Hotsuma answers.

"Well let's go before we lose them!" He grabs Hotsuma by the arm and pulls him along.

When they exited the tent, Hotsuma looks back. He can see some the performers walking off, probably to go take a rest, while others went to their booth to sell merchandise and put on a few small acts. In the midst of the crowd, Hotsuma sees the ringmaster walking alone. Hotsuma realizes the boy never mentioned his name in the show.

_I wonder…who is he?_

Kazuki notices that Hotsuma became dead weight, "Hey. What's up?"

"…" Hotsuma looks back at the tent, "Nothing. Why don't you go with the rest and I'll catch up later."

"Uh? Alright…Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, don't worry about me!" Hotsuma ran off before Kazuki could ask any more questions.

Hostuma lost sight of the boy amidst the crowd, but that didn't deter him. He had to know more about that ringmaster.

_What's his story?_

* * *

**Thank you to everyone who reviews and favorites! It really means a lot!**

**To those who celebrate, Merry Christmas and have a great holiday!**

**Hope to see you in the next chapter! **


	4. Chapter 4

**I'm so sorry for such a late update. It's hard for me to find time to work on this so please be patient! **

4

"What was that all about, Shusei?" Tanaka interrogated. Tanaka caught up with Shusei, who was in his tent, after the show.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't feeling good." He answered simply. Shusei is aware that his answer won't suffice, but he was too tired to try explaining further.

"You are disgraceful! You think you could pull one over on me? You left out your act! Not to mention that your attire is atrocious" Referring to Shusei's wrinkled jacket.

"I'm sorry." Towards the end of the show, Shusei was supposed to have done an act in illusions, but skipped it completely.

Tanaka growls, "I don't have time for this."

Shusei bowed his head in an attempt to look apologetic.

Before he knew it, Shusei was on the ground with a sharp pain running through his jaw. He looked up at Tanaka who's holding a fist in the air.

"Don't you dare disobey me again. The minute you become worthless to me, I'll get rid of you." He didn't bother to stay any longer and left the tent.

Shusei doesn't get up immediately. He opens his mouth a few times to make sure he was okay. Sore, but he was alright, aside from the punch and the fever. He slowly gets up and takes off the jacket and hangs it nicely over the coat rack, although with it being wrinkled, he's not sure why he bothered. He should be heading out to his booth right now, to read fortunes and predict the futures of the clients. Instead, he walks over to his cot and rests, unaware that he was being sought after by a cirque attendee.

...

Hostuma continues to walk quickly through the circus. He can't explain his frustration or anger at not being able to find the boy he's searching for. Hotsuma stumbled upon the area where all the performers are selling merchandise and putting on mini shows for the crowd. All the booths are filled with the actors and spectators, all but one. He looks up at the sign above the empty booth:

_Fortune Telling_

He walks slowly over to the booth.

There isn't much inside. Through the dim lighting, he could make out a small, square table, two chairs on one side and one chair on the other. And on top of the table, lays a crystal ball.

_Could he be the fortune teller?_

He stands still inside the booth, distracted by the thought of the boy being a fortune teller.

_Hm! Probably just a fraud that tricks people into throwing money at him…_

The thought of that boy scamming innocent people irked him a bit.

Suddenly, a cold hand falls on Hotsuma's shoulder, holding him firmly in place. He turns around expecting it to be Kazuki or one of the others, but it was a man he doesn't recognize.

"I'm sorry, sir. Our Fortune Teller seems to be ill." The man with white hair said.

"Oh…it's alright. I was just looking." Hotsuma said, feeling uncomfortable in the man's presence.

"Good. I hope you enjoy the rest of your time at the Cirque." He grins.

Hotsuma nodded.

The man lit a cigar and nodded back. He walked away leaving Hotsuma alone, still inside the fortune telling booth. Hotsuma kept his eyes on the man until he was out of view.

After a moment to let his heart settle from the shock, Hotsuma shook off the meeting with the man and continued to look around the booth. There wasn't anything interesting inside or anything to give away the owners identity. He decided he was only wasting time in the booth and walked out, when a small little box caught his eye. He picked up the box and opened it.

Inside the box is a set of tarot cards. Hotsuma laughs and picks up one card to look at it.

"The Fool?" He read aloud, unaware of the cards meaning. Hotsuma knows nothing about the cards so he places them back in their box and puts it back down.

He never lets the box go and instead of returning it, he places it in his pocket. Hotsuma looks around guiltily, making sure no one saw what he just did.

He steps out of the booth trying his best to act casually and continues to look for the boy.

Hotsuma walks through the crowd of people looking in the background for anyone wearing a green coat with golden trim. After running around in circles and no sign of the boy Hotsuma walked off to the side, out of the way of people, and sat down. In irritation, he threw his head backwards and let out a sigh.

He opened his eyes.

And painted above him on one of the canvas walls was a portrait.

Brown haired boy. Green Jacket with golden trim. Fake smile.

And underneath the picture was a name.

_Shusei Tanaka_

But Hotsuma felt a sense of familiarity with the name. Has he heard it before? Maybe on television? Or in a magazine?

That can't be it. This show is considered illegal after all. It would not be advertised on television or published in some magazine. Maybe someone else he is acquainted with has the same name?

Hotsuma got up, reenergized now that he has a name, so now there should be nothing stopping him.

...

Shusei was unable to fall asleep. The performer's tents were far away from the main events but it was still too noisy to get restful sleep. The echoes of laughter are enough to drive him insane.

Instead of staying around any longer he decides to leave the camp grounds until most of the people left, even though he isn't feeling well. He walks to the opening of the tent and sticks his head out. No workers are in sight, so he takes a step out of the tent and starts walking towards the borders of the grounds. Despite his illness, he hops the barricade easily and quickly gets out of sight. Shusei doesn't know where he's going or what he will do when he gets there. He just has to be alone.

...

Hotsuma looks through a few more attractions and began to notice the crowds were dying. The cirque must be closing soon; he doesn't have much time left. He curses when he remembers Kazuki and the others. He completely forgot about them. It was too late to worry about them now, they probably already forgot about him.

Hotsuma reminds himself to apologize when he sees them again.

Instead of wasting his time he runs up to the nearest performer. It was Steele, the sword swallower. He was putting away his swords and getting ready to close his booth.

"Hey!" Hotsuma said. He comes off rude even when it's unintentional.

"Can I help you?" Steele asked, used to dealing with people of all kinds.

" Uh…" How does he put it? "I'm looking for Shusei, where can I find him?"

"He should be in the Fortune Telling booth." Steele replied, his hand waving in the appropriate direction.

"It's empty. He isn't there."

"Well, then I'm sorry. He must be busy." Steele was paying more attention to his swords than Hotsuma.

"But it's important! I have to-"

"Important business with a Fortune Teller?" Steele raised an eyebrow.

"No! It's not like that. It's just…Is there anything you can do?!" Hotsuma short fuse was burning fast.

Hotsuma's tone got Steele's attention. The blond boy looks serious and Steele wasn't the kind of person to just let someone in need be left behind. He locked up his swords and faced Hotsuma, "You won't leave me alone until you see him, will you?" It was a rhetorical question, "Alright then, follow me."

Hotsuma doesn't allow a triumphant smile to appear on his face. He follows a few paces behind Steele, who led him to an area where patrons weren't allowed.

Steele stops near a line of large tents, "See the tent at the end. That's Shusei's." He pointed towards the last tent, with its lights still on, "Make it quick though, you shouldn't be back here."

Hotsuma nodded, "Thanks." He added quietly.

Steele waves and walks back to clean up his station. Hotsuma blushes, embarrassed at having to have Steele escort him to Shusei's tent. Hotsuma knows how irrational this whole situation is.

Hotsuma looks to the tent on the end.

_How can anyone live here?_

He walks quietly towards the tent. He passes by the other tents and can see silhouettes of the people inside them. He slows down to silence his footsteps. He can't afford to get caught now.

Hotsuma stops at the last tent.

_So Shusei's there…_

Hotsuma holds up a fist like he was prepared to knock and holds in a pathetic laugh. Instead he grabs hold of the fabric of the tent and pulls it aside just enough to look inside.

It's empty.

Surprised at not seeing anyone, he pulls the fabric harshly out of the way.

_He's not here!_

Hotsuma abruptly steps inside, hoping he missed him.

Nope.

The tent is small. Just a bed and some shelves.

"Damn it!" Hotsuma hissed. He looks around the room, curiously. He knows he should feel bad for snooping, but it doesn't stop him. He sees it as an opportunity to learn more about the boy. Hotsuma walks over to the shelf where a couple of books lay. He picks one up and is surprised to see that it was a book on philosophy. Another one was a novel he doesn't recognize, but judging by the size, it's a little over his head.

_Seems like a smart guy…_

Underneath the pile of books was a sheet of paper. Not having learned much about him through the books he reads, he reaches for it.

_Sheet music…_

Hotsuma looks around the room, expecting to see an instrument to accompany the sheet music. The music looks complex and Hotsuma wonders if Shusei could really play this.

He sets the paper down on top of the books. There was nothing left to look at besides some clothes in the corner. The whole place looks run down and Hotsuma doesn't want to stay any longer, especially if Shusei isn't here. He checks his cell phone and realizes it's almost one o'clock in the morning. He remembers overhearing someone in the crowd mention that the cirque will be here another few days, with another show tomorrow night. Rather than staying here, acting like some stalker, Hotsuma decides to come back tomorrow, and next time, he won't lose sight of the ringmaster.

...

It seems to be a ritual now. After every show, Shusei needs to be left alone. After hearing the cheers and laughter he needs silence. That's not something that can be found within cirque grounds.

Every other performer and stage hand knows they won't find their ringmaster after a show.

Shusei isn't aware of the time. All the work he must do for the cirque made him able to work hard off of very little sleep, but that combined with his fever, has taken a toll. He was able to get through the show, but just barely.

The walk back to his tent was uneventful. Everyone else was asleep and it was dark, but he never has any problems navigating through the dark. The only light left came from the small lamp from his tent that he leaves on.

He walks in and stops.

Something seems off, though he doesn't know what at first.

Nobody comes into another's tent without asking. Nobody but Tanaka.

He walks over to his desk and picks up the sheet music that was lying on top of the books. He remembers leaving it underneath the books.

_Who came here?_

As much as the thought of someone coming in his tent bothers him, he doesn't have the energy to get angry. He sets the books down as he had them earlier and falls into his bed.

He's only got a few more days to go before they're on the road again. Tomorrows the last show, and hopefully, Shusei has time to rest.

**The tarot card "The Fool" is sometimes seen as a warning that significant change is coming. Another interpretation is that taking risks or confronting fears.**

**Thanks for reading! **


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey everyone! So sorry for the delay again! Here's chapter 5, Enjoy!**

* * *

5

Hotsuma gets home late, but fortunately, his parents are still not home, so he had no explaining to do.

He goes to his room to changes into pajamas and falls on top of his bed. He looks around his room which is large and spacious. A TV in the corner attached to some video games. Huge dressers for clothes, even though he doesn't care much about what he wears, as long as it's comfortable. It's always kept clean and neat, thanks to the cleaning people that come weekly. He never appreciated what he had before, but after seeing the dingy homes the cirque troupe lives in…

He rolls over, with his face in the pillow and takes in a deep breath. Thoughts of Shusei run through his mind as he falls asleep.

He can't tell what's happening all of a sudden. He feels like he's on the verge of dreaming, but he's wholly aware he hasn't fallen asleep yet.

In his mind he sees himself standing alone somewhere. He doesn't know where he is, but that doesn't matter. A single tear falls down his cheek. The deep sorrow he felt within his heart is too much.

_No…_

He sees himself brace his feet on the ground and summon the last bit of courage his torn soul can muster.

_**Die, Renjou Hotsuma.**_

_NO!_

He watches as his body becomes engulfed in flames.

He calls out to the other Hotsuma, who doesn't hear him.

_No! Stop! What are you-_

"_Hotsuma!"_

Both of his selves look towards the direction of the voice. Their eyes widen at the smaller frame trying to pull him from the hellfire.

It's you…

"_Idiot! Let go of me! You'll burn too!" _The burning Hotsuma calls out.

"_I won't let go! If you do this we can't ever be together again! If you still wanna die-"_

"_Take me with you!"_

_Take me with you!_

Hotsuma covers his mouth in shock, as he realizes he finished the brunets words with him. How did he know? How could he finish Shusei's sentence? How did he know what he was going to say?

The flames surround both boys.

The real Hotsuma became weaker and more tired. The last thing he hears before he falls asleep is screaming.

One in pain…

…The other in horror.

…

Shusei wakes up around 10 in the morning. The smell of breakfast fills the area and it starts to get noisy. The other actors and workers always had a small breakfast prepared in the morning, enough to feed everyone.

After falling asleep in his ringmaster uniform and he decides to change into plain black pants and a t-shirt. He'll take the uniform to get it cleaned and ready for the next show. He doesn't need to be scolded by his boss again.

He walks outside, it was a beautiful morning, but ruined by all the garbage that was left from the previous night. He stopped in one tent to drop off his jacket and vest, the same tent that sews costumes and other accessories. The cirque is very independent. Anything they needed, they made.

He finds a large wooden table where a few of the actors and stage help are eating. They all wish him a good morning, which he returns. He finds a spot to sit even though he doesn't plan on eating. Shusei sits next to Steele, whose real name is Goro, but everyone calls him by his stage name, which he doesn't mind. His gray hair is messy, but it matches his personality better, he's a lighthearted guy. Everyone had full plates of food in front of them. Everything from Japanese food to Western food.

"So, " Steele started, "Who came to visit you last night?"

Shusei looks over raising an eyebrow.

"That blond kid." He specified, "Seemed kind of urgent."

The questioning look stayed on Shusei's face.

"You don't know?" Fortunately, Steele is good at one sided conversations, "Some kid insisted that he see you. Wouldn't leave me alone until he did."

"Did he go to my tent?"

"Yeah, I'm guessing you were gone by then, huh." He took another mouthful of food.

"Yeah. How did he know where my tent is?" Shusei asked.

"Oh, sorry 'bout that." Steele said.

Shusei brushes his hair back and sighs. Well, that explains who was there last night. What did that kid want with him?

"Did he say what he wanted?" Shusei asks.

"Nope. Just said he needed to see ya." Steele said, "Don't worry about it. You know how people are. Probably wanted his fortune read."

Shusei wanted to know more but got the feeling that's all Steele knew. For now he pushes it out of his mind.

He looks down at the table and sees a hand push a plate of food in front of him.

"You look unwell, Shusei, eat something." Steele said.

Shusei thanked him but declines the food, but Steele insisted and in the end, Shusei gave in and had a few bites of toast. He stays a few minutes longer, just listening to everyone talk about last night's show. Most thought the show went great, but a few perfectionists wish they had done better.

Shusei gets up to leave but before he gets far a hand ruffles his hair.

"Take it easy, kid. You look like a ghost." Steele laughs through his genuine concern for Shusei.

"Yeah." He gently moves Steele's hand aside and heads back towards his tent.

He's feeling nauseas and just wants to lie down. He can't deny it any longer, he's really sick. Shusei can barely feel his legs carrying him and his vision is getting blurry. He just makes it back to his tent where he falls to the ground and passes out.

Before he loses consciousness completely, he thought he heard the sound of rain drops…

_It was raining hard._

_The sound of raindrops hitting the trees fills the air. _

_Shusei stands in the middle of a clearing, holding back tears. He's angry, hateful, and above all else, hurt. To think the only person in the world he's ever trusted with everything, his heart and emotions, dreams and desires, would leave… _

_Abandon him._

_Even hate him._

_It's unbearable._

_Especially when that person was all he ever had._

_He looks up towards the sky as if seeking an answer. The rain only blinds him._

_A silhouette appears in the distance…_

….

Back at Hotsuma's house, he woke with a start, still unsure whether his fiery dream was real or just a dream.

_What the hell?! What the hell was that?! _

He's panting and his heart is racing.

_A dream…It had to be. But…it seemed so real._

He falls back in bed. He's too panicked to do anything else at the moment. Hotsuma starts taking deep breaths to try and regain composure.

_Those flames…they felt like…me…_

An annoying ring startles Hotsuma's in his already anxious state. He considers not answering, but figures the distraction will help.

"Yeah?" Hotsuma answers uninterested, only a slight pant left in his voice.

"Hey," It's Kazuki.

"Oh…"

Kazuki laughs, "What happened last night? Everything ok?"

"Oh yeah, sorry 'bout that," Hotsuma has a hard time focusing, "Thought I saw someone I knew."

"That all?"

"Yeah."

"The others were kind of mad you bailed like that." Kazuki said.

"Sorry." Hotsuma can't see why they'd be mad, they don't know each other well. Hotsuma checks the time and notice it's getting late. He has to leave soon, "Hey, I gotta go."

"Wait-"

Hotsuma hangs up. He is too preoccupied to worry about Kazuki and the others. He throws the phone into his pocket on the way out the door, which he makes sure to lock.

He comes to the trail that he took with the others yesterday. In his mind, he tries to map the trail that leads to the cirque. He didn't pay attention the first time; he didn't think he'd go back. He takes it at a slow pace, not risking getting lost. Some of it looks familiar, but in the dark, he isn't so sure.

Eventually he loses his way and wanders off the trail. It's hard for him to walk and he spends a lot of time fumbling through the dark. Even though he's lost, he doesn't worry too much. Hotsuma felt like he was being pulled in a certain direction, like instinct, he couldn't fight it. It wasn't the same path they followed yesterday, but he knows he will find his way.

Hotsuma stumbles upon a paved road.

_Weird._

"Why's there a paved road here? There are no houses down in this way." He spoke out loud the break the silence.

The path wanders towards the cirque so he decides to walk on it. Hotsuma follows it for a few minutes when he spots lights up ahead. He thinks he found the cirque camp grounds, but realizes this light is different. He quickens his pace to discover what it is.

Hotsuma stops suddenly, shocked at what he sees.

_A mansion?!_

A huge stone mansion lies off to the side of the road. The size of the building was incredible. Even through the dark he could see the balconies and turrets. The whole castle looks immaculate and the gardens are well kept.

Hotsuma still can't believe how this mansion stays here and no one seems to know about it. He's sure he would have heard something about it from the people at school.

He feels like his lost in time. For a moment Hotsuma forgets what he's even doing out at this hour. His feet carry him towards the castle, like he's being called. Hotsuma shakes his head furiously to snap himself out of this trance he's been pulled into.

_What the hell?!_

Hotsuma backs away from the castle. He shouldn't be here anyway.

_The Cirque shouldn't be much further._

Even though his determination is strong, Hotsuma has a hard time tearing his gaze from the castle. He forces his feet to keep moving forward towards the cirque and eventually the lights of the mansion turn into specks of light in the distance. Once the castle was completely out of sight, his focus returns, completely to Shusei. This time his quick walking pace turns into a sprint.

The darkness no longer bothers him and before he knew it, he could hear the faint sounds of the circus.

It doesn't look familiar from the first night as he got sidetracked by the mysterious mansion. He appeared around the back of the circus, where people weren't meant to be. He was going to walk around to the front to enter but realizes he forgot his wallet at home and has no money to pay for admission anyway. It's not like the fence is high. One running jump is all it takes to get across. As soon as he lands, he looks in all directions to make sure no one sees what he just did.

He checks the time on his cell phone.

"Shit." He mumbles to himself. The show started 15 minutes ago. The boy will already be on stage, and now Hotsuma has to wait until the end to find him. He won't be able to sneak in the main tent without getting caught.

Even so, what else can he do? He runs over to the main tent.

…...

Inside the tent, the crowd is getting restless. The actors and performers are waiting to go on stage, but the host has yet to arrive.

"Should someone go check on him?" Ayame, a contortionist says out loud.

"We don't have time. I am not getting yelled at by Tanaka because of him." Another performer said.

"Hope he's alright." Steele says.

"What's going on?" A quiet voice said from behind the others. With that tone, he might as well have screamed, "Where is Shusei?"

The whole cast tenses at the sound of the voice. They turn around and see a very angry cirque owner looking for answers.

…...

Hotsuma arrives at the tent but hasn't figured out how to enter it yet. He stays close to the tent walls, still feeling paranoid at having entered cirque grounds without paying.

He holds his ear up to the tent in an attempt to hear the boy's voice. Instead he hears the sounds of people complaining.

_Sounds like it hasn't started yet. _

Over the sounds of people talking he hears another familiar voice. A cold and angry voice.

From the outside, he follows the sounds until he is directly opposite of the voice. Even though he can't be seen, Hotsuma feels vulnerable and stays completely still. He zones out all of the other voices and concentrates on the one he knows belongs to the man he met the other day. Hotsuma gets the chills, when he recalls the man touching him on his shoulder.

There's just something about him…

"Where the hell is Shusei?" Tanaka says to everyone.

"We don't know. We haven't seen him since breakfast." A voice Hotsuma doesn't recognize answers in a scared tone.

"That bastard…" Tanaka mumbles.

Everyone else stays quiet.

"Hmph." He grunts when no one says anything, "You are all worthless. Fine. I'll go find him."

"What an asshole…" Hotsuma can't help but to say to himself. A shred of fear makes its way into Hotsuma's mind. He feels so sorry for Shusei, for he has to deal with this man all the time.

_Shusei_…

Hotsuma is overcome with panic.

_Where is he? _

Hotsuma backs away from the tent. He doesn't know where Tanaka is now and doesn't want to risk being spotted by the man. He backs away and starts running towards the performers tents.

Hotsuma knows he has to find the boy before the man does. Otherwise he fears for Shusei's safety. That man cannot be trusted.

_If he's not at the main tent then he may be back in his own tent._

Hotsuma has to find him before the owner.

He remembers the walk he took with Steele and follows it exactly. In front of him are a line of tents, all of which are seemingly empty. The larger tent at the end is Shusei's and regardless of any one else who may see him, Hotsuma runs over to the tent.

He pulls apart the tents entrance…

And sees the ringmaster unconscious on the ground.

* * *

**I'm so sorry for the delay! I've been beyond stressed lately and haven't found the time to fix this chapter. I've been dealing with chronic injuries, long days at work amongst other things. Even if there are large gaps between my posting new chapters just be assured I have no intention of abandoning this story! I appreciate your patience! **

**( Also, anybody have any idea when the Uraboku manga volume 7 comes out in English? )**


	6. Chapter 6

**What's this? A new chapter so soon?!  
**

* * *

6

Hotsuma didn't expect to see what lies before him now, "Oh Shit!" He rushes over to the boy. He pulls his body into his lap and tries to wake him, "Hey! Hey, Shusei, get up!"

The brunet groans at the sound but nothing more.

"Come on! Get up!" Hotsuma firmly shakes his shoulder.

Shusei remains unconscious, only stirring slightly from the movement.

"Oh, Ringmaster." A menacing voice calls from outside the tent.

Hotsuma stiffens in fear for a moment, even the unconscious brunet shudders at the voice, "Damn." Hotsuma mutters. He has to get the boy out of the tent and away from the monster approaching.

He gently picks up the boy and searches for a way out. There's only one entrance and that's no use. The footsteps are steadily approaching. Hotsuma nervously fidgets within the tent looking for a way out. He sees in the corner, a loose edge where the tent wasn't securely taught. He runs over to it and kneels down to get a better look. He frees one arm that's holding Shusei and lets him rest against him while he looks. Hotsuma is able to pull the tent looser but not enough to walk out. He looks over at the brunet, covered in a cold sweat and shivering. Hotsuma lays him down and crawls through the opening he's made. Once he's on the other side, he grabs Shusei from under his arms and pulls him through. Once he has Shusei again he lets the tent drop and picks up the boy again.

Hotsuma hears the front of the tent move and hears the footsteps inside. He stays still, nervous he will be caught.

"Hey!" A voice growls from inside.

Hotsuma slowly backs up, not sure if the man was calling out for Shusei or if he saw him.

The man shuffles from inside the tent, "Where's that damn kid."

Hotsuma realizes this is his chance to get out now and turns to leave. He doesn't know where to go, just that he can't stay here in the cirque.

"God damn it! Where the hell did he go?"

His voice was grating to Hotsuma, and poor Shusei had to deal with it for who knows how long. He arrives at the area where there are barricades, but fortunately for Hotsuma, they weren't very good. A few feet over is an open spot where he can easily sneak through.

Hotsuma tries, as fast he can, to get away from the circus. It isn't easy, half carrying another person through the woods while it's dark, but he doesn't let the hardship deter him.

Hotsuma eventually found the trail he took with Kazuki and the others which led him to the road. It isn't much longer until they reach the main roads, but a difficult trip nonetheless. Soon the trail opens up to a park where Hotsuma finds a bench nearby and sat down. He is exhausted from having to carry Shusei and knows he won't be able to make it home at this rate.

He perks up at the thought of taking him home. He looks over at the boy, still wearing the ringmaster uniform and still out cold.

Hotsuma throws his head back in frustration, "What the hell am I doing?"

_I basically just kidnapped this kid!_

He mentally scolds himself for his stupidity. His bad habit of not thinking things through really got him this time. On top of that, he can't believe that the boy is still asleep after all this.

_He must really be sick._

His skin is pale and clammy and his breathing is labored. Hotsuma slowly places a hand on his forehead and quickly pulls back, "Idiot, you've got a fever." Hotsuma sighs, "What am I suppose to do, I'm no doctor."

He feels bad for Shusei. He can't just leave him here now, not after what he's done so far. Hotsuma leans forward to grab the cell phone out of his pocket, "No way am I carrying you any further." He calls for a cab which will arrive in about ten minutes. The sooner the better, although Hotsuma is lucky no one is wandering around this area at this hour, his situation would be difficult to explain. It's a quiet evening and if they weren't so close to Tokyo, the stars would be illuminating the sky.

Hotsuma leans back trying to grasp everything that just happened. All he wanted to do was to know more about the boy for some reason. He was drawn to him, he can't explain why. He looks over at him. This moment gave Hotsuma time to really look at the brunet. His bangs were swept haphazardly across his face. He is just a little bit shorter than he is. Hotsuma guesses that he is younger than he is, but his face shows a certain intelligence, that he's been through a lot.

But then Hotsuma remembers the dream.

_It's definitely you…from that dream…_

The blaring lights caught Hotsuma's attention. The cab driver arrived earlier than expected. He pulled up as close as he can to Hotsuma and Shusei.

Hotsuma hears the click of the doors unlocking and tries to discreetly carry Shusei over. He quickly pulls open a door and sets Shusei down in the seat. He looks over when he hears the cab driver chuckle.

"Must have been a fun night…" He says.

Hotsuma glares, "Yeah, yeah…" Although his situation does seem funny, him carrying a passed out ringmaster. Shusei's clothes certainly weren't subtle.

"Where to?"

Hotsuma's tells him his address and the cab immediately takes off.

...

"What's the matter, Tsukumo? You look distracted." The Murasame siblings are sitting on a couch in a large living room, both in pajamas. They're alone in the room, enjoying eachother's company.

The silver haired boy looks at his sister, "It's nothing Toko-chan. I just thought I heard Hotsuma." He has a bag of chips in his hand, but sets them aside.

"Hmm?" She tilted her head, "When?"

"A little while ago."

"Wonder what he's doing all the way out here. You think some subconscious memories could be awakening?" She said. Toko has never had too many problems concerning her reincarnation. Somehow, she always seems to be very knowledgeable of her lives and is capable of controlling the emotions tied to those memories.

"I don't think so, he seemed distracted." Tsukumo thought, "We'll just…have to keep an eye on him. Just to make sure he's alright."

"Yeah," Toko agreed, "I'm sure he's fine, though. He's pretty dense, but tough!" She laughs.

Tsukumo gave his sister a smile, "Yeah."

Toko's smile fades a little. Duras activity has been in a lull lately and as any Zweilt, a guardian, knows, that's never a good sign. "I wonder when…Takashiro-sama will tell him…"

...

It wasn't a terribly long ride, although it would have been strenuous to have carried Shusei all the way.

The taxi pulls to the side of his house, and looks at the boy he transported here. He doesn't look like the kind of person who would live in such a nice place.

Hotsuma's house is certainly no mansion, but for Tokyo it is rather large and western style home. It's away from the busy streets so it's quieter here. It is surrounded by a fence about Hotsuma's height with a gate in the center. He quickly opens the gates and runs back to the cab and pulls Shusei out after he pays the driver. The driver wastes no more time and drives off.

Hotsuma throws one of Shusei's arms around his neck and carries him inside. He flicks on the light. The main room, upon entering his house, is large with tall ceilings and a chandelier gently illuminating the room. He heads towards the large staircase in front of him and decides to take Shusei to his room.

He wanders down the long halls to the very end. His room is at the opposite end of his parents. He likes the privacy and it's not like he's close to his parents. He's more like a tenant than a son. Hotsuma pushes the door open and flicks on the light switch.

A lamp, set on an unused desk, turns on. The walls are tan with darker browns as an accent. The color doesn't suit Hotsuma's taste, but he didn't design it. There are a few clothes thrown around the room as well as his backpack. In one corner of the room are two chairs facing a television that's hooked up to a video game system. That area is covered with game cases and strategy guides. On the other side of the room is his large bed and nightstand. It's very neat for someone like Hotsuma, but he doesn't clean it. His parents hire a cleaning service that stops by once a week. He hates the idea of someone coming into his room, and sometimes he locks his door.

He carries Shusei the short distance to his bed and lays him down. Hotsuma doesn't think he looks comfortable and takes off his outer jacket and hangs it over the bed post. He also takes off his big boots and sets them at the end of the bed.

Hotsuma doesn't know what else to do.

_Should I call a doctor?_

He doesn't think Shusei would appreciate that.

_Well…what now?_

He knows Shusei has a fever, so he runs downstairs into the large contemporary designed kitchen and soaks a washcloth in cool water. Hotsuma also grabs a glass of cold water and brings it up to his room. He sets the glass of water down on the nightstand by the bed and puts the washcloth on the boy's forehead.

Hotsuma isn't sure of what else to do. He doesn't feel comfortable leaving Shusei alone but hates hovering over him like this. He grabs one of the chairs by the television and brings it over to the bedside and sits down.

"Damn it." Hotsuma mutters, "I don't know what the hell I'm doing!"

Shusei stirs.

Hotsuma looks over, expecting him to wake up. Shusei only rolls to his side, away from Hotsuma, and the washcloth falls off.

"No! You idiot, keep that on!" Hotsuma mentally slaps himself for having called a sick, unconscious kid that _he_ kidnapped an idiot.

For being as sick as he is, Shusei seems very relaxed.

"Bet it's been a while since you've slept in a bed like this." Hotsuma said, remembering that thin cot Shusei calls a bed.

He folds his arms and rests them on the bed, staring at the brunet. He knows his parents won't be back for quite some time, so everything should be okay for now.

"What happened to you?" He can't help but talk to Shusei, "Why are you with that asshole that runs that circus?"

_Why do you live like that? Where do you come from? Where's your family? _

_Who _are_ you!?_

Questions are running through his mind, but there's no use in asking them just yet.

Shusei seems to be fidgeting in his sleep. Concerned, Hotsuma leans over to get a better look at his face.

"Hey! What's wrong?"

...

"_NO!"_

_Shusei can barely see anymore, but he doesn't need to see to recognize the voice._

"_Why did you come?" The words were no more than a whisper; he knew they wouldn't be heard. _

I thought you had abandoned me…

"_Shusei! Get up! Don't you dare die here!" A blond lifts his limp and damaged body into his lap, "I swear to God, I'll go to hell and drag you back myself!" _

Are those tears you're holding back?

"_Why?...How could you?..."_

"_It wasn't me! It was all a lie-" _

"_I still can't bring myself…to hate you…but-"_

"_Shusei! Listen! It's not what you think!" The blond screams earnestly._

_At this point it doesn't matter to Shusei, "I can't…I can't see you anymore."_

"_Shusei! Shusei, please!"_

_Shusei's head falls into the blond's chest. Everything went black and all sounds began to fade. But he wasn't scared. Death was all he wanted now. His release. There's no more suffering beyond death, or so he hopes. _

"_SHUSEI!"_

...

"Shusei!"

Shusei hears a voice that seems eerily familiar. He doesn't open his eyes but knows something is off. He's laying comfortably somewhere, definitely not back at his tent. It smells clean. And most of all, he's not being scolded by a certain circus owner.

"Shusei? You alright?"

_Who…_

Shusei looks over his shoulder and groggily opens his eyes, making eye contact with whoever is talking to him.

"…Who are you?"

* * *

**Thanks for reading! All your reviews, favs, and follows mean a lot to me!  
**


	7. Chapter 7

**Ffffinally! Some dialogue between the two! **

* * *

7

Shusei blinks, trying to adjust to his new surroundings. He looks around the unfamiliar room and realizes not only is he not in his tent, but he's nowhere near the cirque. He looks back at the blond, looking for answers.

Hotsuma gulps. _Well this is all MY fault…_

"Uh…Hey." Was the best he could come up with.

"…Hey."

"…"

"…"

"Um…" Hotsuma knew this was going to be awkward, but he figured it would still be easier than this, "How you feelin'?"

"Who are you?" Shusei completely ignores his question. He felt this question was more relevant.

"Hotsuma."

"And?"

"…Renjou?"

"Why am I here? Where am I?" Shusei urges him for answers. _Like talking to wall!_

"Uh… well, you see, "He was fumbling for words, trying to make this sound reasonable, "I, uh, was at the show last night and…uh… well…"

"Wait!" Shusei interrupted him, "Was it you? Who came to my tent last night?"

"Yeah." Hotsuma answered simply. It was easier to let Shusei ask the questions.

"What did you want?" Shusei is curious, "You certainly don't look like the type who'd want a fortune."

"It's not like that."

"Well, what is it then?"

"I…" How does he answer when he doesn't even know?

Shusei nods his head, wanting him to continue.

"I'm not sure."

Frustrated, Shusei lifts himself up until he's sitting on the bed. He looks around again and notices a clock on the nightstand. His eyes widen when he realizes the time, "Oh no!"

Hotsuma watches the brunet jump off the bed. Upon touching the ground, Shusei's weak body can't hold him and he falls. He expects to hit the floor hard but is caught just inches before hitting his head.

"Hey! You shouldn't be moving!"

"Don't touch me! I don't even know you!" Shusei tries to struggle against Hotsuma's hold.

"Stop struggling! I saved you!" Fortunately for Hotsuma, he is stronger. He can feel Shusei's thin frame through his clothes. On top of being sick and living with a traveling troupe, he feels starved.

"Saved me?" Shusei eases up to hear what Hotsuma has to say, "What do you mean?"

Hotsuma gently places Shusei back on the bed and explains what happened earlier; about how he kept him away from the man, whom he now knows as Tanaka thanks to Shusei, and about bringing him to his house.

Shusei's buries his face in his hands. It is a lot to take in, especially in his current condition. He appreciates what Hotsuma did for him, but the blond didn't know the consequences of his actions.

"You shouldn't have done this." Shusei said flatly.

"But-"

"You don't know what you did."

"…But I…"

"You don't think things through a lot, do you?" Even Shusei couldn't hide a smirk.

"I didn't know what else to do! That Tanaka bastard sounded like he was gonna kill you!" Hotsuma tries defending his actions.

"He's always like that…" Shusei unconsciously rubs the bruise on his chin.

The action doesn't go unnoticed by the blond, "He did that?" He nods his head toward the bruise.

Shusei looks at him and quickly turns away.

"He did, huh." The way Shusei avoided him answered the question, "That asshole…"

"It's alright." Shusei laughs, hoping to cut the tension, "I'm used to it."

"That's even worse!" The whole idea angers Hotsuma, "Why the hell do you stay there?"

"Who are you to tell me what I can and can not do?" Shusei didn't raise his voice but his tone was firm. Hotsuma knows arguing won't be effective. Shusei seems set in his ways.

"Hell, I dunno." Hotsuma settles back down, "I just…don't get it."

They both sat in silence before Hotsuma spoke again, "Who are you?" There was genuine curiosity in his voice.

Shusei was taken aback by the simple question, "Why? What does it matter?"

Hotsuma is sick of hearing himself say 'I don't know' and responds by shrugging his shoulders.

"I'm just…" Shusei doesn't want to say much and sticks with the obvious answer, "A member of a traveling show. A ringmaster. That's all. Nothing special."

_You liar. There's more than that._

Hotsuma didn't want to push Shusei, not like this, "You can, uh…you know, rest here for now."

Shusei knows he shouldn't. He should leave, head back to the cirque, more than likely receive punishment, and get on with his life. But something told him to stay. After all, Hotsuma did go through all the trouble.

"You don't mind? Or your parents?" He asked.

"No! No, it's fine." Hotsuma gestured for him to lie down, "Need anything?"

"No, I'm alright." Shusei had no right to ask for anything else.

"I'll get you something to eat anyway. You're as thin as a girl…" He mumbles the last part and leaves his room.

Shusei furrows his brows at the comment he wasn't suppose to hear. He's not really hungry but doesn't say so. He has a feeling if he doesn't take the food, Hotsuma would shove it down his throat.

He settles back into the pillow and takes in deep breaths enjoying the moment.

It seems like hours until Hotsuma comes back with a bowl of soup, "I'll just set it here." He places it on the nightstand next to the bed.

"Thanks."

"Yeah."

Shusei takes the bowl. It smells good and he takes a small spoonful. It wasn't bad. He looks at Hotsuma, "It's good."

Hotsuma acknowledges Shusei but stays silent. He watches Shusei take a few more spoonfuls of soup. Shusei catches Hotsuma looking at him a few times.

The awkward silence came back. Hotsuma blushes a bit and turns away to avoid being seen by the boy, "Ya mind?" He says as he points to his video game collection.

"'Course not. It's your house after all." Shusei set the half empty soup bowl on the nightstand and lays back down on the soft pillow, already sounded sleepy.

With Shusei's approval he turns on a video game but puts the volume on low. He gets through the title screens of the game, but he is barely paying attention. He wants to turn around, to check on the boy, but any sort of contact with him makes him anxious. He tries to lose himself in his game, but it's futile. After a few minutes of playing, the sound of deep, rhythmic breathing catches his attention. He looks over and sees Shusei fast asleep.

_Maybe it's all he needs. A few days of rest._

He hopes so anyway. He doesn't know what else to do.

He notices the time on the nightstand. He has to go to school in a few hours. Hotsuma isn't concerned though. By this time, he already decided he's skipping class tomorrow.

Whether he's going or not, he still needs to sleep. Hotsuma grabs a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt and changes in the bathroom. He'd rather give Shusei a little privacy and heads downstairs to the living room. There are a few guest rooms in his house but he wanted to be somewhere he could hear if the brunet tries to escape later on.

He lies down on the couch and pulls a blanket over himself and falls asleep shortly after, with images of Shusei going through his mind.

….

Shusei's sleep went uninterrupted the rest of the night, despite what had happened. It was the first time in so long Shusei has slept in a real bed. He forgot how comfortable they were. He tries to get up but whether it is his illness, he's tired, or just lazy, he settles back into the bed.

_What happened?_

Last he remembers he was in his tent, preparing for a show and next he wakes up in a stranger's home.

_What does he want?_

He did say it was him that came to his tent the other night. What did he want so badly that he went through all that trouble?

_I have nothing to give._

Shusei passes it off as the cirque atmosphere rubbing off on the blond. And what happened last night, was out of concern for his health. Hotsuma doesn't actually _care_. He was just trying to help, even though he doesn't seem like the type who'd go out of his way for a stranger…

Hotsuma doesn't care! He was just being impulsive.

Shusei decides it's a good time to get up and clear up this whole misunderstanding between him and his host. He notices his shoes and jacket by the bed and looks down to see he's still wearing most of his costume. He takes off the tie and vest and is left in his white shirt and black and gray striped pants. He looks almost normal now.

He gets out of bed and now that he's awake, takes a good look around the room. He isn't surprised by the amount of video games Hotsuma has, he seems like a gamer. The unused desk and books still in his backpack tells Shusei he isn't serious about schoolwork. The light brown walls don't suit him at all.

Instead of snooping around his room, he decides to go downstairs. He opens the door to leave and looks out. Hotsuma's room is at the end of the hall, so Shusei walks out and follows it to the staircase. He wonders if Hotsuma's gone and if he's all alone in the home.

He reaches the bottom of the stairs and looks around some more. It's a huge open space, well kept and elegantly designed. There are rooms to his right and left, a dining room and a study. Behind the staircase was another room. On the couch in that room is the blond, still sleeping.

Shusei walks over silently until he is standing right in front of Hotsuma. Hotsuma appears to be a heavy sleeper and Shusei takes this as an opportunity to really examine the boy. His hair is messy, although that could be from the way he sleeps. He notices he has multiple ear piercings. He doesn't look like the kind of person who smiles a lot…

Shusei feels unable to stand much longer and sees a clear spot on the same couch Hotsuma is on and slowly sits down. The dip in the couch doesn't wake Hotsuma allowing Shusei to relax even more.

"I shouldn't be here…" Shusei whispers.

The blond mumbles, still asleep.

Shusei smiles, "What? You want me to stay?"

Shusei can't make out what Hotsuma says as he is grumbles into the pillow.

"But I don't belong here."

Hotsuma kicks Shusei in the thigh lightly.

"Are you really asleep?" Shusei laughs and immediately covers his mouth to hush the noise, "You're something else. But thank you."

Shusei isn't aware of his conversation with the sleeping Hotsuma, but he can't control it, "I've never had someone care for me so. It's…weird. But, I don't think you're aware of your actions. You seem impulsive." Shusei laughs at himself, "I'm not making any sense, am I? Just…think next time you do something stupid."

He decides to leave Hotsuma with those words, or so he thought. As soon as he stood up, a hand caught his wrist.

"Where ya think your goin'" Hotsuma spoke into the pillow. Shusei barely heard him, "You better?"

"I'll be fine."

"Don't mean you're better."

"You can't keep me here. You realize you're a kidnapper, right?" Shusei said.

"An' you're an idiot for walking around doing all this shit while you're half dead." Hotsuma shot back.

Shusei held his hand to his forehead in frustration, "You're impossible."

"I just want to make sure you're okay-"

"But why?!" Shusei screamed. He was tired of playing these games, "I'm grateful for what you've done for me so far, but what are you talking about? You came to my tent the other night, but what did you want? I can't give you anything! I don't even know you! I feel like I'm some stray dog you've taken in!"

"That's not it!"

"Then what is it? Tell me!" Shusei demanded, "Otherwise, you have no right to keep me here. I have no reason to stay."

Hotsuma sighs. Shusei's right.

Shusei doesn't think he will get an answer, so he turns to leave.

"Sit down." Hotsuma ordered, although he doesn't think Shusei will, "Just give me one more chance."

Shusei looks Hotsuma in the eye and after a moment of thinking he agrees, "Alright. One more chance."

Hotsuma blushes, "It might all sound strange so-"

"It's already strange." Shusei teased.

"You bastard…" Hotsuma growls, "Well, at first it was just…you"

Shusei raised an eyebrow.

Hotsuma notices, "You don't make this any less awkward ya know?"

"What did you expect my reaction to be?"

"Well, yeah…but anyway," Hotsuma waves his hands and gets back on subject, "but then there was this dream or something…"

This caught Shusei's attention, but he made sure to hide his interest.

_So…you dream to?_

Shusei knew it wasn't just an ordinary dream the blond had.

"You were in it…" Hotsuma said weakly.

"…"

"Can I ask you something?" Hotsuma asks.

"Sure."

"Do you…have any scars?"

Shusei shows him his hands, tiny little marks cover his hands from all the work he's done over the years and he even shows him one on the back of his neck just underneath his hairline.

While all these scars made Hotsuma want to ask questions about how they occurred, Hotsuma had to keep himself on track, "Burn scars?"

"Huh?"

"Do you have any burn scars?" Hotsuma clarified.

"…No."

"Oh…" Hotsuma feels dumb for asking now, but he just had to make sure.

_Maybe the dream was a coincidence then._

In his heart he knows he's mistaken. That dream was real, but he doesn't bother to argue with himself now.

"Is that all?" Shusei interrupts Hotsuma's thoughts.

"Well for now…"

"What do you mean 'For Now'?" Shusei asks.

"What do _you_ mean?" Hotsuma questions back childishly.

"I won't be here much longer. The Cirque is moving tonight. I have to leave soon."

"What?" Hotsuma jumped up off the couch, "But-"

"But what?" Shusei asked, knowing he shouldn't have to ask permission to leave, "I appreciate what you did for me, really. But I must leave. I don't belong here."

"Shusei…"

"Thanks." Shusei says honestly, "It was nice to spend the night here."

"You're leaving now?"

"Might as well. It's getting late." He answers casually.

"It's only noon." Not late by Hotsuma's standard.

"I'm sure the rest are packing up and preparing to leave. I should be there helping. I'm sure Tanaka is upset about my absence." Shusei begins walking back upstairs, "Just gonna grab my stuff."

Shusei disappeared up the stairs, leaving Hotsuma alone on the couch. He didn't want to leave Shusei just yet. He knows he isn't in perfect health now. He gets up and walks towards the door. There's a coat rack at the entrance and he slips on a coat over what he's wearing. Hotsuma also puts on his shoes and sits at the bottom of the steps waiting for Shusei. He hears Shusei's footsteps from behind him, but he doesn't turn around.

"What are you doing?" Shusei asks.

"I'll walk back with you."

* * *

**Thank you to everyone who has reviewed! I always love hearing from you!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Just realized I've never done a disclaimer, though it should be obvious, I don't own Uraboku.**

* * *

8

"You don't have to walk with me. It's fine. I'm not from here but I know the way." Shusei tries to convince the blond to stay. He opens the door to leave and tries to close it before Hotsuma gets out but a hand pushes it open and he walks out. He doesn't bother to lock it.

"Nah, I want to. I don't wanna be cooped up here all day." He starts walking in the direction of the circus, knowing Shusei will follow.

"That's your fault for skipping school." Shusei stays a few paces behind Hotsuma.

"Hmph." He doesn't need Shusei treating him like a parent. He slows down a bit, wanting to keep pace with Shusei, "Jeez, don't you have a change of clothes?"

Shusei is wearing the striped pants, boots, white shirt and black vest. The jacket would have been too much, even in Tokyo, so he carries it over his arm, "Maybe you should have packed me a suitcase when you kidnapped me." He smirks.

"Yeah, yeah…" Hotsuma brushes it off. He never would have imagined Shusei to be so sarcastic, "You're a smartass, you know that."

Shusei laughs.

They walk in silence as they quickly hurry through the busy part of Tokyo. By this time, he knows his way to the cirque well enough, and takes the lead until they make it to the path by the woods. The sounds of Tokyo quickly become muffled by the trees.

"Too noisy…" Shusei sighs.

"Ya think so? How do you handle the crowds then?" Hotsuma doesn't anticipate an answer. Shusei hasn't been very open about his life so far, so why now?

"I dunno. I just…have to."

Hotsuma looks at him through the corner of his eye, studying him, trying to learn more.

_Should I ask?_

"Hey, Shusei."

"Yeah?"

"How did…it all happen?" Hotsuma really did want to know.

"You mean the cirque?" Shusei knew what he meant. He's sure Hotsuma had been thinking about it for a while.

"Yeah. It all seems so weird. I mean, you should be in school, like me, and hanging out with friends on the weekends. Not traveling town to town like this." He looks back to see Shusei's reaction.

Shusei looks down to avoid his gaze and questions.

_Did I…_

"Did I say something I shouldn't have?"

"No, it's not that. Actually…" Shusei kept his tone low, even though they were alone and no one else could hear them, "You're the first person to have ever asked."

"What?" Hotsuma is surprised by this, "What about everyone else at the cirque?"

"They all know what Tanaka told them or they just don't ask. Not that I mind, really."

"Oh…" When Shusei doesn't respond, Hotsuma feels bad for having asked in the first place, "It's okay. " He knows one day Shusei will tell him, "You don't have to answer if you don't want to." But really, the curiosity was eating at him.

Shusei smiles, grateful for the concern, "No, it's alright." Shusei picks up his pace so he's next to Hotsuma, "I don't really remember how old I was when I first joined. I was so young…"

"How-" Hotsuma stops when he realizes he interrupted but Shusei told him to ask his question, "How old are you?"

"17."

"Damn! Really?!" Hotsuma surely thought he was the older of the two.

Shusei is amused by Hotsuma's reaction but the amusement doesn't last long and his voice becomes solemn as he goes back to what he was saying, "My parents were-"

Hotsuma nods his head.

"They left me."

Hotsuma stops short for a second. He doesn't know what to say. 'I'm sorry' never seems good enough.

Shusei sees the apologetic look on his face and smiles to ease Hotsuma's worry, "It's okay, you don't have to say anything."

"I'm sorry, I just didn't think-"

"It's fine. Really." Shusei insists.

Hotsuma starts walking again. He knows they aren't too much further from the cirque but wishes this walk could last forever. Shusei's finally opening up about himself, even though he senses the brunet is hiding something important.

"I don't remember much about them, so it's hard to miss them."

"Shusei…" Hotsuma feels bad for making him say all this.

"I had no other family to stay with. And one way or another, Tanaka found me and took me in. I never wanted to go with him but I had no choice. I had nowhere else to go."

Hotsuma slows his pace and Shusei matches it. Hotsuma doesn't feel right to ask any more questions about his past, so he leaves it up to Shusei, if he wants to talk or not. Shusei sighs, taking advantage of the silence.

"Oh yeah!" Hotsuma recalls the banner at the cirque, where he first learned of Shusei's name, "On that banner at the cirque, it had your name as Shusei Tanaka! So, you're not really his son!"

"Oh…you saw that," The fact the blond saw that banner disgusts Shusei, "No, I'm definitely not his son. When he took me in he gave me his last name, so no one outside the circus would ask questions."

"That's good. What a messed up bastard that guy is." Hotsuma was relieved.

"He did save me though." Shusei felt the need to defend Tanaka, though he doesn't know why.

"I guess." Hotsuma still wants to know more, "So you've just been travelin' this whole time. No school or anything?"

"We don't stay in one place for very long. The show is illegal due to the dangers and has no permits or approval to allow us to freely perform. We have to move before we get caught. The longest we stay in one location is about a week. There's no time for school for any of the younger performers. We are too busy honing our acts for much else."

"What can you do?" Hotsuma wonders what hidden talents Shusei possesses.

Shusei smirks, "A lot."

"C'mon! Tell me!"

"Knife throwing and illusions are my strong points. Goro wants me to learn his art, but I refused his offer. For some reason he still wants to train me but…"

"No way! That's cool!" Hotsuma can't picture Shusei doing any of that.

"It's not really." Shusei laughs at Hotsuma's astonishment. He is surprised at how much he enjoys Hotsuma's company. He even forgot all about the cirque or his poor health.

"I wanna see some time." Hotsuma demands.

"Sure." Shusei agrees. It's easier than arguing.

_Some time…you're assuming we'll meet again._

It got quiet again, but the silence isn't awkward. They are both able to enjoy each other's company. Even the short time they've known each other doesn't bother them. They're total opposites but fit together perfectly.

"Don't you get sick of it all?" Hotsuma asks absentmindedly. He wonders how anyone can put up with what Shusei has to deal with.

"Yes."

Hotsuma looks over as Shusei answers. The look on Shusei's face breaks his heart and even scares him. Shusei's fake smile is in place, but his eyes were so sad. Lonely. Hurt.

_The times when he laughed. Smiled. Joked. It was just a cover. Inside…He's just broken…_

Shusei feels Hotsuma's eyes on him and meets his gaze. He smiles, "Thanks for walking with me."

_Don't smile. You don't mean it. _

"No problem." Hotsuma looks up and sees the outline of tents over the trees, "You sure…you'll be okay?"

"Yeah." Shusei walks into the cirque grounds and spares Hotsuma one last glance, "Thanks again, Hotsuma."

Hotsuma nods. He can't deny he'll miss Shusei. He was easy to talk too. And after having to take care of him, he feels responsible for the brunet.

_Don't be an idiot! You've only known him for one day!_

Hotsuma tries to rationalize, but he can't fight what he feels.

He'll see Shusei again. He knows he will, "Hey!" He calls out just before Shusei disappears amongst the crowd.

Shusei turns around.

"If you ever…" Hotsuma blushes, "Ya know, if you need anything, ever, you can…ah... Damn it. Stop by sometime if you're ever in Tokyo!"

"Sure thing." Shusei waves.

...

Unfortunately, Shusei doesn't think he will take Hotsuma up on his offer to visit. What's the point of making friends or creating bonds when Shusei knows he will only lose them? It's far too painful to try and Shusei tries hard to remain indifferent and numb to other people kindness.

It's hard though.

He felt comfortable, too comfortable, with Hotsuma. Nobody has ever gone so far as to do what he did for him. He gave him a place to stay, a warm bed. He didn't ask questions or even expect anything in return. Why _did_ Hotsuma do all this? What made him feel he had to?

"There you are!"

All eyes turn to Shusei as he enters the grounds. Most everything is packed and ready to be moved aside from a few tents and props.

"The hell you've been, Shusei?" Steele asked in a hushed tone, "Tanaka's not happy. I don't know what happened to you, but you better explain yourself to Tanaka. Maybe he'll understand."

They both know he won't.

"I know. I'll take care of it." Shusei doesn't know what he'll say, but he's good at improvising.

He walks around, hoping and not hoping, to find Tanaka. He asks a few workers and performers if they had seen him. They all say no, mainly because they try to avoid him.

Regrettably, he does find Tanaka, leaning against a truck, cigar in hand.

"Ah, Shusei. There you are." He says as he taps the cigar, letting ash fall down to his feet, "Let's go somewhere and have a chat."

Shusei marvels at the amount of menace that taints Tanaka's words.

He's in trouble.

...

The day after Shusei left, Hotsuma chose to go to school, hoping it will serve as a distraction. Instead, everything he does is halfheartedly as he can't stop thinking about Shusei.

_Hope he's all right._

"You're really off today, Renjou." Kazuki said watching Hotsuma's pathetic attempts and scoring goals at practice.

"Damn…" Hotsuma misses again and picks up another basketball. He throws it and it bounces off the rim of the hoop. He doesn't bother to try again.

"Listen," Kazuki interrupts him, "Why don't you just go home."

A few other teammates nod their heads in agreement.

Hotsuma looks over at Kazuki.

"You probably don't want to be here anyway." He mumbles.

"Hey, Kazuki, that's not it."

"Whatever." He shrugs.

"If it's about the other night, I said I was sorry. Why are you so pissed about it?"

"I just wonder if you really care anymore." Kazuki says sadly.

Hotsuma is taken aback, "What do you mean?"

"You're always dazed and never pay attention in class. It's like you never try to make friends. You always look…well…kind of sad and…"

Hotsuma waits for him to finish.

"Lonely."

_Lonely._

"I-" Hotsuma isn't sure of what to say. Maybe he's right. He really doesn't feel like he fits in here. Or anywhere, "I'm sorry." Hotsuma leaves the gymnasium. He doesn't think he'll come to practice anymore.

...

Shusei groans as he picks his head up from leaning on the window of the car.

"Looks like it hurts." Steele says half in sadness and half in amusement to lighten the mood, "Ya'll right?"

Feeling dazed it takes a few seconds for Shusei to answer, "Yeah." Tanaka's scoldings aren't verbal, but physical, and last night he was mad.

"What did you end up telling him?"

"Nothing much." Shusei rubs the side of his head. He opens his jaw slowly and hears it crack.

"Do you wanna see a doctor or something?"

"No." Shusei looks outside the window and still sees Tokyo off in the distance, "Where are we going?"

"Tanaka made a lot of money here. He wants to do another show in Tokyo so we are just moving to another location."

"Tokyo…"

"What? You like Tokyo?" Steele asks, "Well, don't get your hopes up. I doubt Tanaka will let you out of his sight anymore after what happened."

Shusei lets out a groan and rubs his sore jaw.

"Tell ya what, when we get set up, I'll go get some painkillers for you."

"Thanks." Steele pushes Shusei's head to the side, "Just go back to sleep. I'll wake you when we find our new location."

Shusei doesn't argue and just closes his eyes. The hum of the engine soon puts him to sleep.

* * *

**Tess: I didn't know you were Tegthe! Glad to know another active Uraboku writer is reading my story! Thank you so much, your compliments are too kind! (I'm also keeping an eye out for your story) **

**Giogiu: Thank you for always leaving a review! I'm happy to know you like this story so far! **

**Absalon95: Thank you!**

**Amani96: Aw! I'm glad it made your day!**

**To everyone else who favs and follows, thank you for your support! *Throws cookies and hugs at you all***


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: I don't own Uraboku**

* * *

9

The rest of the week went by slowly for Hotsuma. If he went to school he usually didn't stay long before he skipped for the rest of the day. He'd go home and spend time playing video games mindlessly or walked throughout Tokyo. He didn't make any attempt to talk to Kazuki or anyone for that matter although Tsukumo and Toko would try to talk to him. Hotsuma brushed them off, not trying to push them away, but he didn't want to talk.

It is finally Friday and fortunately he doesn't have to worry about hearing from the school over the weekend. It is another boring day of Hotsuma walking through Tokyo in an attempt to clear his mind especially after a phone call from last night.

He received a call from his father. Apparently, he will be stopping home for a day or two. Hotsuma doesn't even try to sound excited over his visit. It's not like they'll talk to each other.

His phone rings through his pocket. He worries it might be his parents again but lets out a breath in relief seeing it is a different number. He almost hits the ignore button but the caller has a strange way of knowing when he's ignored on purpose.

"Yeah, Tsukumo."

"Hotsuma. How are you?" The concerned voice asks, "You weren't in school today. Are you feeling alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"You seem distracted lately."

"So?"

"I just…wanna make sure nothing's wrong." The conversation isn't going to last much longer. Tsukumo knows Hotsuma hates to be approached like this.

"It's fine. Stop worrying."

Tsukumo senses Hotsuma's about to hang up, "If anything…_anything_…is wrong, let me know!" Tsukumo said with such a sense of urgency it sent a chill down Hotsuma's spine.

"Alright. Bye." Hotsuma quickly hangs up. He always feels like he's being pestered by Tsukumo. It's like he's trying to protect him, which Hotsuma finds annoying, especially when Toko does the same thing.

He throws all those thoughts aside. He came into the city to forget everything that's happened so far. He won't let a worried friend stop him.

...

"Well?"

"He hung up." Tsukumo said sadly.

"That jerk! Wait till I get my hands on him!" Toko raises her fist in the air.

"It's alright, Toko-chan." He tries to calm his sister down. She can be scary when she's angry.

"Nobody hangs up on my brother!"

"Toko-chan…" He pulls her onto the couch, "Toko-chan!"

Toko gives an apologetic look and settles down. Her arm is brushed up against Tsukumo and she lays her head on his shoulder.

"I've heard them lately." His eyes are downcast. It's unusual to see him so sad, "A duras. I'm not sure where. He must be hidden in a barrier."

"Tsukumo…"

"I'm worried for Hotsuma. We can't leave him like this much longer. With our without his partner, we have to let him know."

"I guess we should talk to Takashiro-sama." Toko said.

"Yeah. Let's do that." Tsukumo agrees.

They only wish they didn't have to.

...

Hotsuma walks out of the game store. He puts a new game he just bought into his pocket and walks briskly back to his place to play it. Hotsuma walks with his head down, barely seeing anything in front of him. He comes upon a corner and bumps into someone.

"Oh, sorry 'bout that." A familiar voice says.

Hotsuma looks up and sees the sword swallower from the cirque.

"You?" Hotsuma says incredulously.

"Huh," Steele takes a second look, "Oh, it's you?"

"What are you doing here? Didn't the cirque move?" Hotsuma asks.

"Shh," Steele hushes him, "Yeah, we did. Just to the other side of the city, though."

"Still in Tokyo?" Hotsuma can't believe how lucky he is, "For how long?"

"Dunno." Steele shrugs his shoulders, "It was sudden, so we aren't sure."

Hotsuma wants to question him further but notices a bag with some medicine in it, "Is that for…Shusei?"

"Hm?" Steele wonders why Hotsuma asks, "You know he's sick? So, you saw him then?"

"Huh?" Maybe Hotsuma shouldn't have brought it up, "Yeah. So…"

Steele notices his concern and saves him the trouble, "He'll be fine. Don't worry." Steele begins to walk away and turns around, "If you're interested, we are just past an abandoned lot. I think you'll be able to find it." He points to the general direction of the lot, waves goodbye and disappears into the crowd.

Hotsuma is standing in the middle of the sidewalk amazed at his luck. This is another opportunity to see Shusei and he's going take full advantage of it.

...

Shusei is lying in his bed. Bored. He looks over and sees the large book laying on his nightstand. He had already spent a few hours reading through it and couldn't bear to read another page. There's nothing to do in the cirque, aside from practicing acts and choreography.

He promised Steele he wouldn't move until he got back. Usually he doesn't care much but it was either that or risk running into Tanaka who's slithering around the grounds somewhere.

Steele left to go to a pharmacy about an hour ago, so he should be back soon with some medicine and painkillers. Shusei insisted that he don't go, but the man is too caring for that.

"Ya alive in there, Shu?" A voice calls into the tent.

"Yeah, Goro-san, come in." Shusei sits up in bed in an attempt to greet and thank him.

"Hey, it's Steele." He comes in the tent with the medicine, smiling.

"You're one of the only ones who insist being called by their stage name." Shusei states.

"If the shoe fits…"

Shusei looks into the bag. He takes the fever reducer and painkillers. Steele hands him a water bottle. He takes the liquid fever reducer first and cringes at the taste.

"Come on, it's delicious!" Steele jokes. Shusei raises an eyebrow and hands him the medicine, which Steele smells and wrinkles his nose at, "Maybe not. Just take the other medicine and lay down. No getting up and sneaking out. And don't worry about tonight's show. You're off the hook, but I doubt Tanaka will let you off tomorrow, so you better rest up!"

"It's alright. I'm feeling better."

"I'm no doctor but I know the medicine doesn't work that quickly." Steele turns to leave the tent, "Oh yeah, that blond kid."

Shusei looks up.

"Saw him in Tokyo. So you saw him the other day? That where you were?" Steele questions Shusei.

"Uh…"

"It's fine. As long as you didn't do anything stupid." Steele puts his finger over his lips in secrecy, "I won't say anything. He just seemed concerned, that's all." He closes the tent and leaves Shusei alone.

_If he saw him, then he'll know I'm still here. It'd be better if he forgot._

Part of Shusei is happy and he tries holding that feeling back. He wonders, and slightly hopes, if Hotsuma will make another appearance. …...

Hotsuma stops at home before going to the cirque. It's still early in the day, so there shouldn't be a show anytime soon.

_Calm down! _

He sits down on the couch of his living room and thinks about what he's going to do.

_You said I don't think things through…_

What's going to happen if he sees him again? Is there any point in doing so?

_Maybe…I shouldn't._

Hotsuma settles comfortable on his couch and even takes off his jacket. The tarot cards he took from Shusei's booth fall out of the pocket. He picks them up and opens the box. He pulls out the first card he grabs.

_The Fool? Again? _

Hotsuma remembers this was the card he pulled out the first time.

_I wonder what it means. Maybe I could ask him…No! It's not just an excuse to meet him again!_

He puts the card back in the box and throws the pack on the coffee table.

_I'm staying here. We live in two different worlds. I'll stay in mine…you stay in yours._

Hotsuma frowns. Here he is in his world. A large beautiful and comfortable home and Shusei has his…what does he have?

The thought is depressing. Is it right to leave him there?

_He wanted to go back…_

And what right does Hotsuma have to stop him.

But in his heart there's a feeling of needing to protect. Like one would protect a sibling or close friend. But how could an emotion like that stem from knowing someone for such a short period of time? Even though they spent time talking, they both weren't fully open about their personal selves.

_I want to know. I want to know more about you._

Hotsuma lies down on the couch. Not tonight. He won't go tonight. It'd be best if none of this ever happened.

He rests his eyes and concentrates on his breath, oblivious to the pair of red eyes looking at him through his window.

...

"Takashiro-sama, what do you think?" Toko asked. She is standing next to her brother in the study of the large mansion they live in.

"I understand your concerns, and I have World's End keeping a close watch on Hotsuma, but I believe it's best if Hotsuma remains unaware of his actual identity for the time being." Takashiro said. He pushed his long hair over his shoulder, revealing a large scar on his face.

"Are you sure?" Tsukumo looks at the man, his eyes clearly stating his worry.

"You know Hotsuma is very protective of his partner. If his memories were to resurface, the thought of not having Shusei will devastate him. And when he's like that, he'll only cause more trouble, considering the instability of his God's Voice." Takashiro said.

"You still have no idea where Shusei is, then?" Toko asked.

"No. After what happened in his previous life…" Takashiro avoided their gaze. He's always had his Zweits with him, through so many years and lifetimes. He cherishes them dearly and hates to see the never ending suffering they must go through with fighting this war, "Shusei must have been so deeply hurt and just wants to hide…"

He's never told anyone of what Shusei went through; he's their leader but he would never betray their trust unless it was for the good of the clan. When Shusei died in his last life, he was so emotionally torn that, in his last moments, he may have wished to disappear from this world entirely.

"I hope he's okay. Shusei, I mean. I hope we find him." Toko whispers.

"It's not the same without them. Hotsuma and Shusei…" Tsukumo says like he's remembering the times they had shared in another life.

"Please," Takashiro stops their depressing thoughts, "Do not worry about this matter. I'll take care of it. You two need to be on your guard. When we bring Yuki here, you can't afford to be distracted."

The siblings nod in understanding, but their sorrow remains in their eyes.

"Please take the rest of the day to relax." Takashiro waves them out of the room and focuses on the paper work he was given earlier.

The two exit the room and head towards their bedroom.

"What do we do, Tsukumo?" Toko asks.

"We can't do anything now, Toko-chan." Tsukumo tries to ease her mind but can't even relax his own, "But, I don't think we should ignore Hotsuma. Even if he never knows-"

"We'll still be there for him!" Toko finishes his sentence and smiles with a sense of resolve.

It's not what either of them wants, but they both think it might be for the best.

"It would be cruel to bring Hotsuma into this life without Shusei." Toko adds, "I can't imagine all this fighting and not having you by my side. It would be so painful… and lonely."

Tsukumo sees the slight frown on his sister's face and grabs her hand, reassuringly, "I'll be here, Toko-chan. Don't worry." He smiles for her.

She squeezes his hand, letting her dear brother, and partner, know the same.

* * *

**Thanks again to all my reviewers and watchers!**


	10. Chapter 10

10

Hotsuma has been on edge lately. He doesn't know why. He feels he should be happier than he is, considering he can see his friend again but…

_Wait… My FRIEND? Shusei? Can I really consider him that only just having met him?_

Regardless, the unease he feels is suffocating. He keeps looking over his shoulder and catching glances in window reflections to see if he's being followed.

_God… I'm paranoid!_

He jumps when his cell phone goes off. He checks the caller ID and sees it's Tsukumo calling. He debates for a moment on whether or not to answer it, but after remembering how he was short with him before, he answers, "What's up?"

"Oh, Hotsuma!" Tsukumo was surprised, "I didn't think you'd answer!"

"Yeah, well, you know…"

"Did you want to meet up today perhaps? Just you and me. At the café by the shopping center?"

Hotsuma wants to immediately decline, but remembers he upset his whole basketball team and is now running really low on friendships. He better not lose Tsukumo too.

"Sure. When?"

Again, Tsukumo was surprised, "Oh, how about twenty minutes? Toko is shopping now, so we have plenty of time to sit!"

"Alright, I'll see you soon then." Hotsuma says, and starts walking to the café.

...

"Wow! He agreed to come! He must be feeling pretty bad!" Toko says.

"He does seem out of it…I'll feel better when I can talk to him. You sure you'll be ok, Toko-chan?" Tsukumo asks, full of concern.

She puts on a brave face, "Of course! No worries! I won't be far anyway! Just keep me updated with your God's Ears, I want to know how he's doing."

"Alright, I will. Take care!"

Toko walks away to the nearby stores, careful not to stray too far in case her brother or Hotsuma needed anything. She quickly ducks behind a shelf when she sees Hotsuma pass by on his way to meet up with Tsukumo.

...

Shusei groans, turning over in his bed. He's sore, dazed and full of the medicine Steele had given him.

_I've got to be more careful. At this rate, I'm not sure I can go on…_

Just then a girl walks in, startled by Shusei's presence, "Oh! I'm sorry Shusei! I didn't expect to find you here. I just wanted to drop this off!" She is holding his uniform.

"It's alright, you can set that over there." He points with his head to the coat rack.

"Ok." She says.

Shusei can tell she is trying to avert her gaze from his bruised face, "Thank you." He tells her to ease the tension.

She nods in response and leaves the tent.

Shusei falls back on to his bed, sighing.

_The show must go on ...  
_

He closes his eyes, allowing the medicine he's taken to lull him back to sleep.

...

The café is crowded with loud conversations on either side of Tsukumo and Hotsuma.

"You've been really out of it lately, Hotsuma. Sure everything is fine?" Tsukumo asks.

Hotsuma hearing Tsukumo, turns to him in a daze, "Huh?"

"That's what I mean." Tsukumo says sipping his soft drink, "Your mind is a million miles away."

"I guess…"

Tsukumo doesn't know how to approach Hotsuma and uses his powers to reach out to his sister for some advice.

_Toko-chan… How do I talk to him? I thought it'd be easy but… I'm afraid I'll trigger something I shouldn't…_

She responds immediately.

_Don't worry! He's your friend, one of your best even if he doesn't know it! He'll open up to you if you give him the chance._

"Hotsuma…" He tries again.

The blond looks him in the eye.

"Don't be afraid to tell me anything if you need. I won't judge you or harass you, but whatever is bother you is really taking its toll."

"I know, it's just…"

Tsukumo waits patiently for Hotsuma to gather his thoughts.

"Things have been weird lately." Hotsuma averts his gaze, staring at the floor.

"How so?" Tsukumo tilts his head questioningly.

"Weird dreams for one." Hotsuma stares off trying to recall the dreams, "There was one where...This is gonna sound so stupid… but there was fire. I was on fire! Or something. I don't know. Forget I said that."

Tsukumo stared blankly, realizing this isn't a dream but a memory from the time he attempted suicide. Again he reaches out to his sister.

_Toko! He's dreaming about his past life! _

She responds

_This isn't good! If he thinks about it too much he could activate another memory. Like Takashiro-sama says, he can't remember yet! _

"What are you so nervous about?"

Tsukumo perks up at Hotsuma's question, "Nothing at all. I'm fine." He regains his composure, "I'm sure it's just an overactive imagination getting the better of you."

"Probably, but…" Hotsuma thinks about telling Tsukumo about Shusei, but decided against it.

"But what?"

"Nothing, nevermind." Hotsuma diverts his attention, another way of telling Tsukumo to drop the subject.

Curious and worried now, Tsukumo uses his power to listen in on Hotsuma's thoughts, something he typically avoids for the sake of Hotsuma's privacy. He hears a bit of everything at once, tuning out the usual thoughts and is immediately alarmed when he hears a very familiar name:

Shusei.

But…

_Shusei Tanaka? That can't be right. Shusei's family name has always been Usui. Could it be the same Shusei?_

Tsukumo, having kept Toko enlightened on the conversation hears her voice enter his mind.

_Tsukumo, I think it's best you leave the conversation there. You may accidentally trigger a memory. Even our presence alone could do that. Let's call it a day._

"Hotsuma, why don't you go home and get some rest. You're looking a little pale. We can talk again later." Tsukumo stands up with Hotsuma following his lead, "Plus, if I let Toko shop anymore, she'll spend all of my money." He smiles.

"Yeah, alright, I'll see you around then." Hotsuma waves goodbye, walking in the opposite direction.

...

"You heard all that, right?" Tsukumo asks Toko, who is behind him with a few shopping bags in hand.

"Yeah…"

"Did you also-" He begins to ask but Toko cuts him off.

"Yeah, I've got the same feeling." She shivers, "Something isn't right."

"Us or him?" Tsukumo points with his head to Hotsuma off in the distance.

"We should at least make sure he gets home alright." She asks.

"Of course. I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if anything happened to him." Tsukumo is clearly worried. Toko lays a reassuring hand on his shoulder, "This whole situation, it's not his fault. "

"I know, but Takashiro-sama says-"

"I know what he says, but it isn't right. He could be in danger if he doesn't know what he really is. And how could he know Shusei?" He looks to his older sister, "Could they have met?"

"I would think Hotsuma would have felt something, like he would just, _know_." She could only guess.

Tsukumo nodded slightly in agreement, "Let's make sure he gets home."

...

The walk back home seemed long and tiresome. The tension in the air thickened to the point Hotsuma felt like he was choking. The paranoia came back in full force and his eyes flickered left and right tirelessly to make sure no one was around aside from the few passerby's.

Eventually Hotsuma passed through a quiet part of town without a person in sight and suddenly a growl came from behind the blond. He turned around expecting a stray dog but instead was confronted with a demonic wolf like creature with glaring red eyes. The fur of the beast was a shining black and looked as if each strand of fur would cut up anyone who touched it.

"What the hell?!" He called out in surprise. He took a few steps backwards.

The creature followed his pace and for every step back Hotsuma took, the beast to one towards him.

Baring its teeth and focusing its gaze on him, the wolf lunged forward ready to attack.

Hotsuma could see the creatures claws extend, aiming for him. He prepares to jump out of range and manages to dive out of the way instinctively,narrowly avoiding the attack.

Unable to recover from the dodge quickly enough Hotsuma cusses under his breath. He braces for the pain that is surely to come as the wolf turns around and prepares for another assault. Hotsuma manages to come to a kneel and sees the creature coming towards him at a supernatural pace. Just when it was a breath away from making contact a gun shot rang out and the beast fell sideways.

Now, more startled by the gun shot, Hotsuma looks over to the source of the blast.

"Ts..Tsukumo?!" He said incredulously, lowering his gun.

"Hotsuma, are you alright?" He asks.

"What the hell… Toko?" He sees Toko standing by her brother with a large sword in her hand.

Tsukumo's gun dissolves into thin air, as well as Toko's sword. "It looks like we have a lot to talk about, Hotsuma."

* * *

**So this is the last chapter I have written out, now I actually have to find time to sit down and write some more. I am writing out a specific chapter that I need to be able to finish in order to continue this story so updates will probably be slow for a while. That being said, I found another story on my computer that's inspired by the anime Psychic Detective Yakumo (yes, another Hotsu and Shusei fic) I'm thinking of uploading that one next and maybe work on that one while I figure out the rest of this story. I'll probably upload the prologue soon so I hope you'll give it a shot! **


	11. Chapter 11

**I don't own Uraboku.**

* * *

11

Needless to say, the course of Hotsuma's day changed drastically. Instead of going home, Hotsuma is sitting on a bench in the city alongside Tsukumo and Toko, staring blankly at his feet.

"So, Duras…" Hotsuma says again, "They're demons…and you fight them." He says in disbelief.

"_We _fight them." Toko corrects him, "You are one of us. A Zweilt."

"There's no way that's possible." He responds flatly.

"She's right, Hotsuma." Tsukumo interjects, "We are lucky you've made it this far without having been hurt. Duras are attracted to us. We are natural enemies."

"Natural enemies? Don't tell me this is some sort of feud that's been going on for centuries between two clans or something so cliché." He scoffs at the idea.

"Well…" Tsukumo and Toko laugh at the truth of it.

"So, what exactly are we called again? Zweilt? What does that even mean?"

"We are soldiers who fight for the sake of the Gioh clan. We fight… in pairs…" Toko informs him.

"In pairs? So you and your brother."

"Yes."

"What about me? Do I have a partner too?"

"Well…" Toko wonders how to tell him.

"Hotsuma," Tsukumo cuts her off, not wanting to trigger too much, "I know this is a lot to take in. Don't push yourself just yet. Take it easy."

"Don't tell me to take it easy Tsukumo, "Hotsuma growls, "You've known all this time and didn't think _this_ may have been something you should have told me earlier? Instead you wait until I was almost eaten by that monster?!"

"It's not so simple Hotsuma." Tsukumo frowns. He always wanted to tell Hotsuma but Takashiro forbade it.

"No shit!" He gets up to walk away but Tsukumo grabs his sleeve, "What?" He barks at him.

"Our ride is here." He motions to the black car pulling up to the trio.

"Our ride? To where?"

Toko smiles, "Home! To the Twilight Mansion."

A well-dressed woman steps out of the driver seat of the car to greet the three, "Hello Tsukumo-kun. Toko-san." She bows, "Hotsuma-kun. It's good to see you are well. I am Ibuki, Takashiro-sama's assistant."

Hotsuma mumbles a hello.

"Please take a seat. I'll take you all home." She gestures to the back seat of the car.

Toko sits in front, next to Ibuki, leaving the two boys in the back.

"This can't be happening…" Hotsuma says to himself.

"You'll understand everything in time. Don't worry so much." Tsukumo says.

"Wait, " Hotsuma says skeptically, "You had a gun and a sword earlier. Where are they now? They disappeared before…"

Simultaneously, Toko and Tsukumo hold up their hands, showing him their silver rings. Tsukumo slipped his off his finger and allowed Hotsuma to get a closer look.

"These rings contain our weapons. Takashiro-sama has cast a spell on them. They allow us to carry them at all times so we are always prepared for a duras attack." They explain as Hotsuma turns the ring in his fingers. He notes the weight of it, obviously a sturdy ring. He sees the engraving 'AGLA TSUKUMO.'

"You have one as well, Hotsuma-kun. Takashiro-sama has it." Ibuki says from the driver's seat.

"How's that possible? How could he have one for me?"

Toko sadly glances at her brother, not ready to explain that yet. Fortunately, Ibuki handled this question, "This isn't your first time in this situation. You and the other Zweilt are all reincarnated. The ring he has for you has been your ring for many, many years now."

Hotsuma's eyes widened, "Reincarnated?"

"It's true. I know it's hard to believe." Tsukumo says.

"Just so we can get all this out of the way… Is there anything else I should know about? Anything big, I mean. First it was monsters and now reincarnation? Don't tell me I can breathe fire or something…" He jokes.

Toko holds back a fit of laughter, "Actually…"

"Some Zweilt are gifted with special powers or attributes, I myself am known as 'God's Ears' as I can communicate telepathically with others and hear their thoughts." Tsukumo says.

"And…" Hotsuma urges him to continue.

"Well you are known as 'God's Voice.' You can summon fire."

"I'm done for today. You can stop talking now." Hotsuma's rests his head on the car window with a loud thud.

"You haven't changed much over the years Hotsuma. Still the same old hot headed thug!" Toko laughs.

"Who are you calling a thug?" Hotsuma barks, "Haven't changed much… what do you know!"

"A lot actually. I remember my past lives." She says full of pride. Somehow Toko has always been able to remember her past lives very clearly.

He drops the subject rather than throwing insults at the girl. Hotsuma rests his head back on the window absentmindedly watching the city go by. The number of buildings dwindle and more trees appear.

"We will be at the mansion in about 15 minutes." Ibuki says.

He ignores the remark, still trying to take in the events of the day. While the thoughts of monsters, strange powers and a war that's been going on for centuries should be enough to fill his mind for days, Hotsuma focuses on the fighters themselves. The Zweilts.

Whenever he pushed the subject too far, Toko and Tsukumo would grow quiet, cautiously so.

_What could it be that they won't tell me?_

Tsukumo glances at him, Hotsuma shoots a glare in his direction remember what the boy said about his telepathy, "What, I can't even have privacy in my own mind?"

"Sorry Hotsuma, " Tsukumo sadly smiles, "You're quiet and I was concerned."

"Whatever.."

Feeling his mind was his own again, his thoughts resume.

_It must be about my "Partner." They won't say anything about that. What could the problem be? Maybe he's at the mansion? Maybe they can't say anything until I meet him?_

The remainder of the car ride was spent in silence, with the Murasame siblings occasionally passing concerned looks towards Hotsuma. The soft orange glow of sunset and the gentle roar of the engine put Hotsuma at ease helping even allowing him to close his eyes as if he were asleep.

_This can't be real…_

"We're here." Ibuki said as she turned off the car.

Hotsuma opened his eyes and saw the same mansion he passed by many nights ago.

"This…This is the Twilight Mansion?"

"Yes, Welcome home." Tsukumo smiled, "It's very peaceful here. And it's protected by a barrier. Normal people can not enter here."

"Let's go inside!" Toko smiled as she ran through the front doors.

Hotsuma, following Tsukumo, stepped inside the mansion to a large foyer. The large chandelier illuminated the finely furnished room. A woman was standing beside the banister of the stairs wearing a kimono.

She introduced herself and bowed, "I am Aya, I tend to the resident of the mansion here. If there's anything you need, please don't hesitate to ask."

Hotsuma nodded thanks and slowly walked up a few steps, "I do know this place…" He muttered.

"Of course you would."

He walked up the steps and looked over the railing taking in all the details of the mansion.

"Hotsuma, do you need anything?" The Murasame siblings asked.

"No, I know where I am going." He said barely believing himself, "Can I?"

"Of course, this is your home. Don't forget that." Tsukumo smiled.

He made it to the top of the stair case and Tsukumo called to him one more time, "I'll come get you later. Takashiro will want to meet you personally."

Hotsuma nodded, more focused on one of the rooms at the end of the hall.

He never stepped foot in the mansion in this life, yet his body instinctively moved towards a certain door. He slowly grabbed the door knob and turned it revealing a large parlor. Sofas and chairs were centered in the middle of the room with a large bay window in the back. The curtains were open revealing a colorful sky lit with reds, purple and dark blues. He stepped in and sat in one of the plush sofas and took a deep breath.

_Feels like home…_

He looked ahead and saw a door. Curiosity over riding him, he opened it and it was a bedroom.

_This is mine, isn't it?_

It was clean, obviously, the room was currently unoccupied. A bed, a dresser, a small entertainment space at the farther end. It was a more contemporary design compared to the rest of the mansion, preferable to Hotsuma's taste.

Since it was otherwise empty, lacking all of his personal belongings of this life, he left his bedroom and turned to the door opposite his bedroom door. He hesitated in front of it, like opening the door would be intruding on the owner's privacy.

His partner's?

_Could he be inside?_

Hotsuma's hand shaked a bit. Could he finally solve the mystery of his partner? Could he be sitting in his room now?

He knocked but there was no response. He slowly turned the door knob and peered inside.

It was empty. Somehow, Hotsuma knew that would be the case.

Regardless of whether it was right or wrong, he entered the room. Unlike his, this room was more classic in design. It had all the essential furnishings. There was a large desk in place of the entertainment space Hotsuma had in his room.

And just like his room, it was otherwise empty.

All of a sudden a powerful feeling of sadness fell upon the blonde. More accurately, it was loneliness. The nostalgic thought that this room should be occupied yet wasn't was depressing. Rather than further snoop around and risk a more negative emotions coming on, he left, closing the door behind him.

He went back and sat in the sofa he originally sat in. He leaned his head far back and took in a few deep breaths trying to figure out the emotions dwelling within him. Before he could completely collect his thoughts there was a knock on the parlor door.

Tsukumo popped his head in without waiting for the blonde to respond, "Hotsuma, Takashiro is downstairs. He'd like to see you."

* * *

**So sorry for the delay... Real life has kept me busy. And to add to that, my health hasn't been the greatest. I hope to update soon though! And as for my other story I said I'd publish, after rereading it, I want to work on it some more and get the story line solid. Not sure when it will be up so until then I'll be working on this story.**

**Thanks to all my loyal readers and reviewers! Reading your reviews make me so happy!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Still don't own Uraboku. **

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12

Following the white haired boy, Hotsuma reluctantly descends the staircase. Before reaching the bottom, a new figure catches his eye. A man sitting in the sofa in the recreation area in the front of the mansion. It was a tall man, he could tell, even when he was sitting. He had long light brown hair and a scar on the left side of his face. He also noticed Ibuki standing by, giving him a reassuring smile. Without even saying anything, Hotsuma had reservations about meeting this man. There was something about him Hotsuma didn't trust, like he was a man with many layers of secrets.

When he reaches the bottom of the stairs, the man stands and introduces himself, "Hotsuma, it's good to see you are well. I am Takashiro Giouh. The leader of the Giouh clan," He held out his hand which Hotsuma hesitantly took.

"Tsukumo told me about today. He's also made you aware of the situation regarding our family. I've never intended for this to happen so soon. I'm sorry, I know this is difficult." Takashiro said.

Hotsuma wasn't sure what to say to this man just yet, after all, he's the leader. He's not even sure how to address him.

"You've no need to worry about anything just yet regarding the Duras. Since we have discovered your reincarnation, we have been keeping a close eye on you."

This irked Hotsuma, "You knew all this and never told me anything, why is that?!"

Tsukumo and Toko winced at Hotsuma's tone in speaking with their leader.

Sensing their uneasiness, Takashiro turned the siblings, "Would you mind giving us privacy."

They nodded and left, as well as Ibuki.

"Hotsuma, your situation is…unique this time around. Otherwise, the minute we found you, you would have been under my care immediately. Believe me, I do have your best interest at heart." Takashiro said quietly and with authority.

"What do you mean my situation is unique? What's wrong?"

"Honestly…I don't know exactly." Not knowing clearly irritated the man.

"What the hell kind of an answer is that?" Hotsuma yelled, "You can't just say all that and not give me an answer!"

"Hotsuma-" Takashiro attempted to calm the boy down remembering his fiery temper from all his previous lives.

"After what I saw today, everything has changed now…my life won't go back to normal…and supposedly I am some soldier with powers and here you are telling me nothing?" Hotsuma fumed.

"It's not that simple, Hotsuma, " Takashiro ignores his abrasive attitude, "What I mean to say is that the reason I am unaware of your situation is because I wasn't there…at the end."

"The end?" Hotsuma echoes.

"When your partner died."

Hotsuma's mind went blank. Not sure of what to say he waited for Takashiro to explain further but was disappointed when he didn't.

"You found your room before. Why don't you rest. Tsukumo will come for you when dinner is ready. If you need anything else, ask him or Aya. We'll talk later." Takashiro turned leaving Hotsuma in the foyer by himself.

_When my partner died?_

He stood alone in the room staring at his feet, wondering.

_What am I supposed to do now?_

"Hotsuma?"

He looked up and saw Tsukumo peering from behind a corner.

"I heard the commotion." He says, "Just wanted to check up on you."

Hotsuma nods, "It's fine…"

"No it's not," Tsukumo smiles, "But that's okay too."

He walks up to Hotsuma and grabs him gently by the arm, "Let me show you around."

For a while Tsukumo just leads the absentminded Hotsuma around the mansion talking about the mansion and what goes on where. Eventually he leads Hotsuma to the courtyard and sits on a nearby bench, inviting the blond to sit by him.

"Nobody knows why things happened the way they did back then. Not even Toko remembers. But also we weren't there."

Hotsuma realized he was referring to his past, "If I remember…will everything just fall together?"

"I don't know." Tsukumo says sadly, "But we aren't meant to remember. We go through life after life, fighting and getting hurt and seeing those we love die. It's better for us that we don't remember."

"I think Takashiro knows more than he's letting on…"

"That's probably true. He's not exactly easy to talk to though. He's been alive for hundreds of years. He's the one who reincarnates us and has been leading this battle from the beginning. He has many secrets but I can assure you of this, not even he knows what happens to you two."

Hotsuma stayed silent for a while. The cool breeze gently rustled the boy's hair and the sound of leaves stirring soothed his thoughts somewhat.

"Everything will be fine. I promise. You two, no matter how much you argued, everything always worked out. You're too stubborn to not get your way." Tsukumo smiled.

Hotsuma let his head fall into his hands. Today had been draining and he can feel his body slowly sinking and his mind emptying, ready to embrace sleep.

"What was his name?" He asked.

Tsukumo knew his name could trigger memories or strong unyielding emotions. However he knew he couldn't keep it a secret for long. Inevitably Hotsuma would know.

"Shusei. Shusei Usui."

Hotsuma's eyes shot wide open. All thoughts of fatigue left his body in that instant.

_That name… it couldn't be… could it?_

Tsukumo knew the consequences of telling Hotsuma his name, but he couldn't not tell him now. Tsukumo can't imagine a world without his sister. The thought of her being alone and lost would kill him. That was the empathy he felt for Hostuma and that is why he told him.

"Hotsuma, don't do anything rash." Tsukumo said calmly.

"Of course not." Hotsuma said with a grin.

Before Hotsuma could up and run Tsukumo chimed in, "Dinner should be ready now. You must be hungry."

Having had a busy day, to say the least, Hotsuma hadn't even realized how hungry he was until Tsukumo mentioned it. His growling stomach answered the white haired boy's question.

"Come, let's go to the dining room then. You can meet Tooma-san. He's our chef."

There was no point in protesting as Tsukumo again grabbed Hotsuma by the arm leading him to the dining table. Slowly the residents of the mansion began filling the space, some Hotsuma met, others he didn't. There he was introduced to Tachibana the curator who was a little to clingy for Hotsuma's taste. He also met the mansion's doctor Isuzu who was clearly sleep deprived.

Eventually Toko came in, sitting next to her brother, "How are you adjusting, Hotsuma?" She asks.

"Fine." He said, focusing more on the meal than the girl. He admitted to himself this was without a doubt one of the best meals he's had in a while. As much as he was enjoying the meal, his mind was elsewhere. In the background he could hear all the talking of the Twilight Mansion's residents however all he could think about was meeting with Shusei again.

_Could it be him? If I tell him, would he remember?_

With his plate clear, he rises, "I'm going to my room if you don't mind."

It having been a long day, no one minded the blond returning to his room.

Obviously he wasn't there to rest, but rather pace relentlessly across the parlor of his room.

_I need to see him again, that's for sure…_

He glances around until he finds a clock. It's late, too late to venture out in the dark, fortunately for Hotsuma, listening to common sense isn't exactly his best attribute.

He quickly throws on his jacket and walks out his door.

He hurries down the stairs, too preoccupied to bother saying anything to the mansion's residents, and quickly walks to the door. As he places his hand on the door knob a voice calls for him.

...

_Since when have the days become so long?_

Shusei wonders to himself walking amongst his adopted family of sorts. They were all busy with work but lately Shusei had been given a reprieve due to his failing health.

_It's all his fault…_

He continues thinking. Ever since Hotsuma entered his life he hasn't quite been feeling right. Usually his days went by with a blur, going through the motions of life only because it's what his body was telling him to do. But ever since that blond appeared, it's like he woke up and he isn't sure how to go about life.

_Things were easier before you came along._

Despite the strange comfort he feels having met Hotsuma he wishes the encounter never happened. If it's one thing Shusei learned in this life, it's that whenever something good comes along, it inevitably disappears leaving a dark pit in his heart. Somehow though, he just knows the blond will make another appearance. After all, he doesn't exactly think things through.

_Please, Hotsuma, just stay in your world and leave me in mine…_

* * *

**Sorry this one is a little short… this just seemed like a good spot to end this chapter. **

**I just want to take some time to thank my reviewers! You guys are awesome! In response to your latest reviews:**

**AliceMcHugh240: Ahh! You have no idea how much I loved reading your review! Thank you so much! Hope to hear from you again! **

**Giogiu: Hotsuma is too single-minded to be worried about the forces of evil when his partner is somewhere on the loose! Thanks for the review! **

**Tess: I love having Hotsuma interact with the Murasame siblings. Toko vs Hotsuma with Tsukumo on the sideline trying to cool them down… It's fun to write! (P.S. I totally forgot to sign in when I reviewed your new chapter! I'm still loving Destiny!)**

**Amani96: Don't worry! Shusei will be back soon! :D **

**Bob: Will do, thanks for reading! :D**

**And thank you to everyone who favorited and follows this story!**


	13. Chapter 13

**I'm so sorry for the delay! I wanted to update this sooner, but you know… life happens.**

**Anyway, enjoy!**

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13

"Hotsuma?"

The blond turned around and once again saw Tsukumo. He always seemed to appear when something big was happening anymore. The concern he felt for Hotsuma was comforting, but now, Hotsuma thinks he's becoming overbearing.

"What is it now, Tsukumo?" He asked with slight irritation.

"Takashiro wants you to live here now. He thinks it's imperative now that you know. With your power it could be dangerous if you're out there an alone. Not to mention the duras." The boy explained.

"Listen, there's something I need to do. I'll come back. I swear. Just please let me do this." Hotsuma knew Tsukumo understood his meaning.

"Hotsuma," Tsukumo starts, "I get it. Really, I do. Just please be careful. You don't know what memories you might trigger. Things could get…bad…" He lets the last word linger hoping it gets through to Hotsuma to be wary. He walks up to an irritated Hotsuma and grabs his hand.

Hotsuma feels Tsukumo place something tiny and cold in his hand. He opens his palm and sees two silver rings. One is engraved with his name. The other is Shusei's.

"How did you get these?" Hotsuma asks.

"Let's let that be our little secret." Tsukumo winks playfully at him.

Hotsuma slips his ring on, instinctively placing it on his thumb. He pockets Shusei's ring, and lets his hand linger on it to make sure its safe.

Tsukumo smiles at this and says as he sees Hotsuma rush to the door, "And if you need anything don't hesitate to call me." Tsukumo smiled as he pointed to his ears.

"I will never get used to this psychic thing…" Hotsuma turned away and left, slamming the door and stranding Tsukumo in his room. The door creaks open and Hotsuma sticks his head in, "And stay outta my head!"

Tsukumo laughs at his roughness and then whispers to the air, "Bring him home, Hotsuma."

….

"So what's on the agenda for tonight?" Steele asks, looking at Shusei who is picking at the meal on his plate.

"You ask the same thing every night, and my answer is always the same. The usual." Shusei smirks in both annoyance and amusement.

"Just trying to keep you on your toes. Plus, the boss isn't around. That's unusual." Steele shivers after mentioning Tanaka.

"It happens from time to time." Shusei says.

_Cherish this short moment of peace while it lasts._

"Where does someone like him go anyway?" Steele asks absentmindedly.

"I'm not sure myself. I know better than to ask." Done with the food he hasn't eaten, Shusei gets up.

"You'll keel over if you don't eat, ya know?" Steele says growing tired of Shusei's constant reluctance to eat.

"I know." Shusei says staring off.

He stares off into the distance, letting his mind wander from one thing to the next, too drained to focus on one particular thing. He suddenly feels the need to just up and leave this place. Like his old life was slowly strangling him and the only way to take a deep breath and feel relief was to just go somewhere.

"Maybe, today will be different." He sighs to himself. This sudden and unexpected idea begins to wake him up some.

"What do ya mean?"

"I think…I'll go to Tokyo." He says like he rehearsed it.

"What?" Steele says, shocked, "You can't do that!" he knows Tokyo is the kind of place Shusei would want to avoid, so his change in attitude startles him.

Shusei ignores him and begins to walk away almost in a daze, letting his body move independently from his brain.

"Shusei!' He calls again.

"Don't worry, I won't be too long." He reassures him, but he really doesn't know.

Maybe he won't come back at all.

….

Shusei doesn't know what possessed him to venture out into Tokyo. . Maybe just the change of pace was refreshing. Or perhaps the glance at what life could have been like while staying at Hotsuma's made him wish to see the city like a normal civilian.

He passes by a building with crystal clear windows and shudders fearing images flashing into his mind. Lately they have been relentless, any reflective surface has been a source of pain for him. Fortunately he's spared this time from the images.

_The nightmares have been brutal lately._

But before he looked away he catches his face in the reflection.

_I look so old…_

It's not like he has wrinkles or grey hair. But it's the look in his eyes that makes him seem mature. The pale skin accentuating the darkness under his eyes and the almost constant frown on his face have aged him. Not to mention the fading bruises.

At this, he realizes he doesn't even know himself anymore. Who is the person reflected in the glass? What is his purpose? His reason for living? If he were to drop dead right here and now, no one would know. No one would care. Sure there were be some who would be in awe at his sudden departure, nonetheless they would carry on with their day with that thought now lost in the back of their minds.

His shoulders sag as his pace slows. The thoughts feel like a physical weight dragging his body down.

Again he peers through the windows of the stores he passes by allowing himself to be distracted by the items inside. Through them he sees all the things he'll never have. Cozy furniture, electronics, and more.

_But you could have that… You could have and do anything you want._

He mentally smacks himself, "Look at me, becoming bitter." He laughs darkly, "You should never have helped me. Here I am, jealous of your lifestyle."

Continuing to look into the shop windows he catches an unusual reflection, one that shouldn't be there.

_Red…eyes?_

He looks around, trying to identify the source. No obvious sign of what caused the red looking eyes are in sight.

_Must have been a street light._

He shakes the image from his mind, blaming it on the fact he is tired. He stops near the corner and laughs, "What am I doing here?"

….

Running through Tokyo like his life depends on it is Hotsuma, weaving through people and objects with a swiftness he never knew he had. A sense of urgency filled him and now he knows why.

_Duras…_

He recalls how Takashiro and Tsukumo told him of the demons that infiltrate their world and how they and the Zweilt are natural enemies. When the area is dense with duras a Zweilt can sense their presence.

This makes him nervous, remembering his first encounter with the creatures. But he takes comfort in Tsukumo telling him how he monitors the area with his "God's Ears" and that there is nothing in the area that can cause Hotsuma harm, just some low level duras that cause mischief and nothing more.

But now, Hotsuma knows the truth about his past and what Shusei really is to him. They weren't just strangers, they were partners and even if Shusei doesn't remember, Hotsuma decided that doesn't matter. He will look out for him and make sure he is safe from the duras. And not just duras, but everything.

_So this is what it means to be a Zweilt, huh?_

Even though he's never been in battle, at least in this life, he already feels the pull of partnership. He knows now why the Murasame siblings are hardly ever apart. This isn't a feeling that can be tempered nor can it be withered by time. Being a Zweilt is forever and the feelings only grow stronger with time.

He looks down to the silver ring on his thumb, feeling whole.

Hotsuma only comes back to the present when he turns a corner and runs right into another person.

He initially curses the object but is silenced when he identifies the figure as Shusei.

"Shusei? What the hell are you doing here?"

….

"Easy, Hotsuma, "Shusei regains his balance after what felt like being hit by a car, "What's the rush?"

"What are you doing acting so casual? Hotsuma yells at him, "Hell, you even look almost normal!" He said referring to Shusei's casual clothes.

Shusei smiles a bit, "Am I not allowed to be here?"

"No, that's not it…" Hotsuma stands there awkwardly. He intended to go find Shusei but now that he's here he isn't sure how to handle the situation.

"Is something wrong?" Shusei asks.

"No."

Shusei's eyes questions him.

"Yeah. Actually, yeah… there is." Hotsuma turns on his feet avoiding Shusei's eyes.

They stand in silence for a moment, Hotsuma shuffling his feet while Shusei studies him.

"So?" Shusei starts.

"Things…have been weird lately." Hotsuma says quietly.

Shusei chuckles, "It must be hard to be you."

"Shut up!" He bites back, "You don't look so good either, ya know?"

Hotsuma fidgets a little more then realizes Shusei is waiting for him to say more.

"Hey, Shusei?"

"Yeah?"

"Can we talk?"

* * *

**Boring chapter is boring, I know. But I promise next chapter will be the start of much drama! And the next chapter is half written so it shouldn't be too long!**

**Also, as a little gift I wrote another little unrelated one shot which I will upload by the end of the week, so please look out for it!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Another chapter so soon?! **

* * *

14

The two sit on bench in a quiet part of the city. After Hotsuma learned Shusei hadn't eaten he went to a convenience store and bought some food and drinks for him despite the others protest. Without listening to Shusei's complaints, Hotsuma throws the bag of food onto the other's lap.

"Really, I'm not gonna fall apart if I don't eat, you know."

"Shut up and eat." Hotsuma says. When Shusei glances at him from the corner of his eye, Hotsuma threatens to shove the food down his throat himself only earning a small laugh from the brunet.

"Hotsuma, you aren't here to make sure I'm fed." Shusei says ignoring the food, "What's really going on here? Is something wrong?"

"Who says I'm here to see you?" He pretends to be preoccupied by the sights and sounds of the city when he's really focusing all of his attention on Shusei. Hotsuma has no idea how to approach the situation. How can he tell Shusei he is a reincarnated warrior with special powers that he uses to fight demons? Hell, he still can't believe it!

And then he remembers the warnings given to him by Tsukumo and Takashiro.

His memories could destroy him.

"You have strange dreams, don't you?" He says. Instead of just telling him, Hotsuma decided it was better to see what Shusei knows instead.

"Doesn't everyone?"

_Damn. Shusei doesn't make things easy, does he?_

"I suppose."

Silence comes between the two for a moment. It makes Hotsuma fidget but Shusei is content with it.

"Don't you ever wonder…" Hotsuma carefully says, "If dreams aren't just dreams?"

"You mean premonitions?" Shusei guesses.

"Perhaps." Not exactly where he was going with this, but it's a start.

"You don't seem like the type who would take an interest in this kind of thing." Shusei says while playing with the wrapper of one of the snacks.

"Not really but…" Hotsuma fears to dig any deeper. After all, he isn't sure of what to make of their past life together.

He looks over to Shusei who is pretending to be preoccupied by the food which he still hasn't eaten. He really begins to notice how fragile he is.

_Maybe he isn't meant to fight in this life._

And that doesn't bother Hotsuma.

_As long as he is here and safe, what does it matter?_

...

Shusei carefully studies Hotsuma's expression. There's pain there, that much is for sure. He starts to take in all the little details he's never really seen before like the fiery color of his golden eyes, the creases caused by his scowl, his lean but strong form, the wild way in which his hair lays.

_It's all so familiar…._

While he doesn't actually know Hotsuma well, he is able to read him like an open book. Hotsuma's the kind of person who wears his heart on his sleeve. While his intimidating demeanor may cause others to be wary of him, he actually has a kind and caring heart.

But his familiarity with Shusei cause the brunet concern. It always has since they first met. Why would someone take such an interest in him? For what purpose? No one in this life has ever truly cared for him the way he has and the kindness completely unnerves him. Shusei can never afford to let down his guard.

_Do I know you?_

While reminiscing about his short time with the blond he feels a numbness comes over him as well as a sense of foreboding. This sudden sense of anxiety takes control of his senses and Shusei's chest begins to tighten like a pair of cold hands are constricting his heart. His nerves begin to go haywire and his hands tremble.

_What is this? What's going on!?_

His eye sight begins to blur and his vision doubles. Breathing becomes difficult and turns into a wheeze and he brings his hands to his throat in an attempt to ease the difficulty in breathing.

"Shusei? What's wrong!?" Hotsuma jumps up and within a second he has both his hands on Shusei's shoulders, "Talk to me! What's wrong?"

Shusei stares into the eyes he only studied moments ago. Behind them, he sees another pair of golden eyes, the same ones, only this pair is far more desperate and pleading than the real ones.

He can't separate the two images he sees before him. And he's slowly becoming unable to separate reality from the hallucinations. These voices of another time and place overlapping the here and now.

_Yes, that's it. It's the dream…it's colliding with this world now._

At least, that's his best guess.

He looks away from both pairs of Hotsuma's eyes and looks down. On his chest, he sees red.

"Blood!" Shusei gets up and screams, so abruptly he knocks Hotsuma back.

He senses Hotsuma staring at him while he runs his hands across his own chest, trying to find where he is bleeding from.

"What's going on?" He whispers to himself.

"Shusei, you need to tell me what's going on!"

Ignoring Hotsuma's pleas, he continues dwelling on his delirium, "Am I dying?" Shusei wonders.

Hotsuma hears the questions and immediately jumps in, "No! You're not! Listen to me, I am right here! Concentrate on my voice!"

The pull of this Hotsuma's voice is powerful and Shusei feels drawn to it, but the lingering fear still has a tight grasp on his mind, "I can't…"

"Don't give me that crap, of course you can do it!" Hotsuma says in his usual abrupt way.

Another voice creeps into Shusei's mind one that chills him to the bone. A voice that's familiar and yet so foreign. A voice that reminds him of despair and chaos.

"You haven't changed at all Shusei." It laughs, "Some powerful Zweilt you are. Still succumbing to you own weakness…"

"Who are you?" Shusei asks pitifully.

"Oh, you don't remember me? I'm hurt." The voice feigns pain.

"Who are you!?" He asks again with slightly more force in an attempt to sound stern, but still his voice faltered with fear.

"You really don't remember? It's me… Grave."

Shusei hears the name and feels his knees weaken and falls into darkness.

...

Hotsuma stands by hearing a one sided conversation. He desperately wants to reach Shusei but doesn't know how. He dosen't even know what's really bothering him. If he were a passerby, he would think he's witnessing a man having a mental breakdown.

But being a Zweilt, and Shusei too, he suspects it's not that simple.

Again he tries to reach him, "Shusei, please, talk to me! Let me help!" He pleas.

No luck, Shusei is absorbed in the darkness of his own mind.

The he hears Shusei say something that has no relevance to this lifetime, "Grave…" He breathes out as he falls to the ground.

Hotsuma hurries to his side leaning Shusei's body against his chest and repeats the word over and over again, "Grave? What did you say that for Shusei?"

Again, he replays the word over and over in his mind.

_Grave…Grave…_

Then it hit him like a train.

_It's a name! I know it, but why? _

Shusei stirs in his arms and a moment later his eyes slowly open.

...

The rain hits his face, cool and gentle but a welcome feeling compared to the burn he feels all over his body. Burning from wounds and from the warm blood that covers him. He tries with all his might to open his eyes and somehow he manages it but the small motion drains what little energy he has left. Looking up he locks eyes with the same golden eyes he used to look upon so fondly. Only this time the fondness turns to the feeling of betrayal and he chokes back a soft cry, not allowing himself to show this pain to the one he used to trust so much.

He tries to pull away from Hotsuma's embrace but fails, "Let me go." He says cooly.

...

"Let me go." Shusei whispered with a tinge of hate.

"What? After what just happened? Are you mad?" Hotsuma says.

His words fall on deaf ears. He sees Shusei looking down. He watches closely as Shusei brings his hand up and observes it with dread.

"Shusei? What is it?' He asks.

"The blood… and rain…" He says tiredly.

"What?" Hotsuma is beginning to panic.

_He's hallucinating! _

"Shusei, there is no blood." He says with the firmest voice he can pull together, "And it's not raining." He looks to the sky to prove his point, "Look, you can see the moon, no clouds!" . He sees Shusei looking through him and he knows his words aren't reaching him.

Shusei tries to pull away as if his touch disgusts him, "Let me go." He says again with a little more fervor.

"Shusei, you're not well. You need to let me help you!"

As if the wounds he imagined were suddenly gone, Shusei pulls himself away and drags himself to his feet, "Why do you care! I'm nothing! Nothing!" He chokes out, "Please just go away. I don't want to see you again!"

"Shusei, pull yourself together! You're smarter than this!" Hotsuma begs. He in no way imagined any of this would happen. Persuading Shusei that he was an ancient warrior would be preferable to his current breakdown.

Faster than Hostuma thought possible Shusei ran off. He was almost out of sight before Hotsuma started going after him.

* * *

**I'll try to be a little quicker with updates now that I am getting back into writing , but I can't promise anything.**

**I'd appreciate it if you leave a review!  
**

**Thanks for reading!**


	15. Chapter 15

**So my computer has been on the fritz lately... hence why this chapter took forever... Anyway, enjoy!**

* * *

15

Shusei managed to get a good lead on Hotsuma despite his current state.

_What's going on?! It's like I don't know who I am. Where I am?_

"Is that all you can do? Run away?" Grave's voice called from somewhere around him.

Shusei stops and turns on his heels.

"Where are you?" He calls out to his surroundings.

"I'm everywhere."

Shusei wanted to challenge him to come out and face him, but realized there was nothing he could do in his current state.

He hears footsteps racing from behind him but by the time he turns around he is tackled to the ground by the blond.

_Damn, he's fast._

Before he could focus on the Hotsuma in front of him, he hallucinates another Hotsuma calling out for him in desperation.

_Not again!_

"What are you doing?" The real Hotsuma asks.

"I don't know!"

"Good freaking excuse that is!" Hotsuma yells.

"Get off!" Shusei pushes him off. He grabs his head with both hands trying to block out all the stimuli from his surroundings in an attempt to gather his thoughts. He silences the wind whistling through the trees and the real Hotsuma's voice but the hallucinations keep coming. The fake Hotsuma yells at him and berates him for being useless and selfish. It brings Shusei to his knees and in a whimper he asks to whichever Hotsuma will answer, "Am I really better off dead…"

"Damn it, Shusei."

The next thing Shusei knows, he's back on the ground with a very real and very mad Hotsuma on top of him, his hand balled into a fist. Shusei brings his hand to his chin and realizes he was punched by the blond.

"Knock it off with this crap! If you were really better off dead do you think I'd go outta my way for you! I didn't think you could be this dense!" He yells, enraged by Shusei's self-loathing.

Shusei looks down, ashamed of the way he's been. He gathers himself the best he can, which isn't well at all, and looks the real Hotsuma in the eye, "Then...please help…"

Hotsuma is torn by Shusei's pitiful expression. He sees in his eyes the pain and despair of what he believes to be his past life tormenting him, "You idiot." He says as he walks over extending his hand to his friend and partner. Before he can pick him up Grave's voice rings out again.

"Well isn't this cute?"

Hotsuma's eyes turn to daggers as he tries to locate the voice, "Grave." He calls out.

"Oh, you remember me? I'm honored God's Voice."

"God's Voice?" Shusei repeats quietly, "You are God's Voice."

"Shusei…"

"That's right, Shusei. Are you remembering now? What's wrong? Are you not enjoying your memories?" Grave asks faking concern.

"Why not show yourself!" Hotsuma taunts, "Are you scared?"

"What? Me scared of you? Don't flatter yourself."

"Then why not come out and show your ugly face?" Hotsuma screams to his surroundings, which he now notices is in a forest near the edge of the city. Shusei must have been going back to the cirque.

"You'll regret that…"

Hotsuma and Shusei notice a veil of light surround them and the area. If it wasn't accompanied by a menacing presence, Hotsuma would have said it was beautiful.

"A barrier." Shusei says with a hollow voice as if he hadn't said it at all.

"Shusei…You're seeing the truth aren't you. Do you know what you are?" Hotsuma asks.

"Maybe. I think so…yes."

"Then you know, "Hotsuma stutters, "That we are destined to fight together right? You and I…we're Zweilts."

"We can't be." Shusei says flatly.

"What!?" Hotsuma yells in surprise, "Just when I thought we were getting somewhere."

"You don't want me. You left me."

Hotsuma's jaw drops, "Not this shit again! What makes you believe that?"

"You left me for dead." All trace of emotion and life left Shusei as the words came out of his mouth.

Not able to physically knock sense into him again, Hotsuma drops the fist he didn't know he made. The look in Shusei's eyes was beyond anything he could handle. He lowers himself to his knees to be eye to eye with Shusei, "What do you want me to do then?" He asks.

Shusei remains quiet. There's nothing he can say anyway.

...

The adrenaline has worn off and Hotsuma kneels in the dirt not even caring about anything going on around him.

_I guess being a Zweilt is all about pain._

He glances to Shusei who looks like nothing more than a corpse now.

"Well this seems familiar now doesn't it?"

The two Zweilt look around them and focus on the same direction. Hotsuma stands abruptly as a shadow appears from the treeline.

"Finally…" Hotsuma growls.

Standing before them is a beautiful Opast. Short grey hair and matching grey eyes accompanied by a devilish grin. Dressed from head to toe in black flowing garments lined delicately with white trim complementing his chromatic appearance.

The sense of familiarity and the unknown battled inside Hostuma, "You…"

"It's been a while, hasn't it Hotsuma. You've hardly changed." Grave greets him. He looks down pathetically at Shusei, "Oh Shusei, this has been a fun game hasn't it. Although you don't seem to have appreciated it." He laughs.

"What have you done?" Hotsuma asks. Since Shusei has been beyond his help, there's only the Opast to ask.

"You can see it, can't you? The memories are coming back are they not?" Grave asks while studying the claws on his hand.

Hotsuma recalls all the dreams he's had. The rain, the despair, and Shusei…. He sees the images but can't make sense of what had happened. The memory is there but it's not perfect.

"You two are really amusing. I've enjoyed my time with you. But sadly, duty calls. I'm afraid this game must come to an end." Grave says coyly, "But before that, I'd like to see you suffer just a bit more." He laughs.

Hotsuma braces himself, not prepared for whatever is about to happen.

"You really don't remember do you?" Grave says legitimately shocked, "Luze and Elegy, you remember them, yes?"

His gut churned at the names and the hatred they bring. The name sounds familiar to Hotsuma, but he can't quite picture their faces.

"Perhaps this little trick will remind you." Grave says as his form begins to change, the beautiful grey eyes dull to a dark brown, a familiar suit replaces the elegant garb and the smell of cigar smoke begins to fill the air.

He changed into Tanaka.

"It can't be…" Hotsuma breathes out, "All this time…"

Graves voice remains as the image of Tanaka laughs, "Oh, now you see!"

The form changes back into the elegant Grave, the Opast.

"If you've known all along, why…" Hotsuma has a hard time saying the words, "Why didn't you kill Shusei long ago?"

"Well, that' just wouldn't nearly have been enough fun." Grave says like it's obvious.

"So you took Shusei in as a part of some freak show just to toy with him?" Hotsuma accuses but feels a glare from Shusei at the term freak show, "No offense." He says quietly to the brunet.

"That's exactly right." Grave smiles.

"You sick bastard…" Hotsuma growled, a fire burning in his stomach. To have spent years and years torturing Shusei was more than Hotsuma could endure.

"And you, Hotsuma…Perhaps you'll remember this." Grave says as his shape changes once again into a perfect image of a bloodied Shusei. His voice a perfect imitation of Shusei's speaks, "Do you remember? All those years ago?" He says as blood drips from his mouth and multiple wounds and pooling around his feet.

Hotsuma winced, finding it hard to stare at the image.

"You remember…"

Shusei's painful memories and the nostalgia of the image before him was like a punch to the gut. He stumbles back as a powerful feeling of nausea overcomes him.

"I remember… back then. In our other life…" He whispers to himself. His eyes are glazed over, not able to see this world but images of the past instead.

The pieces are finally coming together.

"Hotsuma." A quiet voice calls.

He looks over to the real Shusei.

"You wouldn't…." He gathers his strength, "You wouldn't betray me… would you?"

"Never."

"It wasn't you then, was it? Back then."

"No."

"So you two finally see. Too bad it's a lifetime too late." Grave laughs once again returning to his original Opast form, "The other Opasts were all about bloody combat. Not me. I like to toy with my prey. I'm not skilled with a sword or spear. Turns out, I am a master of illusions. And what a better way to kill my opponents than to let them kill themselves!"

* * *

**In case you don't know, Grave is pronounced Grah-veh, in keeping with the Opast's being named after musical notation. **

**Next chapter probably won't be up quick. It's a pretty long chapter and it needs a lot of work. I may or may not post it in two parts. **

**Thanks for all your reviews! They really keep me going! **


	16. Chapter 16 -The Past-

**So sorry for the delayed update... I've been having so many problems I couldn't even think about getting to this story lately. My car broke down, my health isn't great right now and I ended up in the hospital, and my computer is on death's door so it's a miracle I can even upload this.  
**

**Anyway here's the chapter that clears up what happened in Hotsuma and Shusei's past, hope it was worth the wait! **

* * *

_~The Past~_

_Duras activity had been picking up, meaning the Zweilts have been busy to the point of exhaustion. _

_On one particular day, the activity picks up to a level no one saw coming. _

_A new Duras appears, although at first, no one knows it. _

…_._

_It had been routine for Zweilt pairs to go out and patrol the area around the Main House. _

_Toko and Tsukumo are closely guarding the perimeter, close enough to always keep the mansion in sight._

_Kuroto and Senshiro stay at the main house and work as personal bodyguards to Yuki. They are still in training, learning to work with each other's strengths and weaknesses as they are still a relatively new pair. _

_This leaves Hotsuma and Shusei to patrol further out off the grounds amidst the trees._

_It had started out as a quiet day, both of them thinking they will be able to go back home without incident. But almost simultaneously, the hair on the back of their necks went up and they both knew something wasn't right. _

_Like a gust of wind, a group of Duras have surrounded the Zweilt pair. Some were human looking, others were creatures bearing resemblance to animals._

_Hotsuma scoffs, not impressed by the number of low leveled Duras that surrounds them. Shusei places a hand on his shoulder, a way of telling him to stay alert, that something isn't right._

"_Don't get cocky…" Shusei whispers, "There's something else out there."_

"_Doesn't matter. I'll get him." Hotsuma grins as his hands shake out of anticipation._

"_Hotsuma, wait! Something's not right-" Shusei tries to tell his partner, but he runs ahead ready to engage in battle. _

_Shusei sighs, taking a step back to make sure he's not missing anything. He sees Hotsuma summon his weapon and he does the same. With his two swords in hand he prepares for the battle. _

_The swarm came forward but seemed hesitant. _

_Shusei noticed this and held back a little. He certainly wouldn't let them hurt either Hotsuma or himself but he didn't need to kill them outright. Not yet. _

_Hotsuma hadn't noticed Shusei's hesitancy and began swinging Masterstroke, taking out any Duras that came within the swords reach. _

_Out of nowhere, Shusei becomes aware of the fact that he is losing orientation. He feels his body swaying and the faces of the Duras fade in and out. Before he knows it he loses sight of Hotsuma and realizes the Duras are now coming in at full strength ready to kill the Zweilt._

_He picks up Kurai Kurou, his swords, and methodically takes out the Duras despite his condition. A few Duras had been able to strike Shusei, leaving deep wounds, but nothing mortal. Blood covers a large portion of Shusei's clothing, making him look weakened but with only a few Duras left, Shusei goes in and attacks them, killing them easily. _

_With the corpses of Duras about him, he kneels in the dirt, trying to regain his composure when a familiar voice rings out._

"_What the hell, Shusei?" _

_Shusei perks up at Hotuma's irritated voice, "Hotsuma?"_

"_Where did you go? You can't just leave like that!" He interrogates his partner.  
_

_Noticing his harsh tone, Shusei questions him back, "What are you talking about? I'd never leave you." _  
_Shusei cringes as he notices large wounds on him that are dripping blood and pooling at his feet._

"_I was calling for you! You didn't answer!" He notices the blood on Shusei, "You can't leave like that! Look at you, you're covered in blood!"_

_The sudden accusations were annoying Shusei, "Why are you acting like this? Hotsuma-"_

"_You aren't strong enough to be on your own, you know that! You specialize in defense, remember? There's a reason for that!"_

"_Sorry to be such a nuisance." Shusei shot back._

What is wrong with him?

"_I'm sick of worrying about you, Shusei!" Hotsuma continues, "It's hard enough knowing we have God's Light to protect, but you too? You've become a liability, Shusei." _

"_Why are you saying this…" Shusei is dumbfounded, "Where did all of this come from?"_

_Having had enough, Hotsuma walks away, leaving a bloodied Shusei behind._

"_What…just happened." Shusei stays kneeling, trying to wrap his head around the confrontation._

…_._

_Hotsuma finishes off the last of the Duras, with no more than a scratch on his arm. He looks around prepared to flash a triumphant smile at his partner only to find Shusei nowhere to be found._

"_Why can't you stop and use your head for just a moment, Hotsuma."_

_The blond turns to direction he hears Shusei's voice coming from._

"_What? Shusei? What happened? Are you hurt?" He catches a glimpse of the silhouette leaning against a tree. _

"_Just stay there." Shusei says, "It's not like you care anyway."_

"_What do you mean? Of course I care! We are part-"_

"_Just stop." Shusei interjects, "Partnership means nothing. Look at Kuroto. Partners can be replaced. That's what you'd like, isn't it?"_

"_What!? No! Of course not! How could you even suggest that?" Hotsuma looks frantically for any sign of what is going on, "We've been together for hundreds, hell, thousands of years!"_

"_Bonds can always be severed."_

"_Where is all of this coming from? What the hell is wrong with you?"_

_Hotsuma's question goes unanswered, as Shusei walks away._

…_._

_Hotsuma and Shusei walked back to the main house separately, both in awe of what the other said to them._

_Shusei walks into their shared living space and sees Hotsuma lying on the couch. When Hotsuma sees his partner a deep frown appears on his face._

"_Thought you didn't care. What are you doing here? Know what, nevermind, I'll leave." Hotsuma gets up and briskly walks past Shusei bumping his shoulder as he passes him. Shusei lets out a small moan as that shoulder had been hurt during battle. A small trace of guilt dawns on Hotsuma until Shusei speaks._

"_Of course, don't concern yourself over my well-being. I don't need a baby-sitter."_

_Hotsuma scowls, Shusei is never usually so harsh, "You've changed."_

…_._

_Shusei stood on the balcony of Twilight Mansion running over all the scenarios that had taken place the past couple of weeks. His estrangement from Hotsuma has been weighing heavily on him. _

_It's true, some of what he said. Shusei had always been physically weaker but he had always been a capable fighter nonetheless. Perhaps Hotsuma was upset he couldn't keep up with his stamina. _

_But to have taken that and blow it out of proportion doesn't seem like him. Hotsuma had always accepted him as he was and could always depend on him so what happened to have changed all that? The presence of God's Light, perhaps? Maybe the stress of protecting the Light has pushed him to the edge._

_Shusei doesn't know. He can't pinpoint a time and place when their relationship took this drastic turn. It seemed so sudden, like Hotsuma wasn't himself._

_The real question is, how to remedy this situation?_

_For the sake of their safety this can't go on. Shusei decides to see if this will blow over. No point in talking to an enraged Hotsuma. He'll just have to wait for the appropriate time and place._

…_._

_The tension between the two Zweilts only intensifies since neither of them want to talk about what has happened. Shusei has tried to bring it up but is given the cold shoulder. Typically these little spats were nothing to the pair. They have them all the time. But there's venom in their words now unlike before and the distrust is weighing on them._

_On patrol again, the two keep their distance, Shusei standing further back, and Hotsuma keeping a quicker pace. Both trying to ignore each other while simultaneously trying to pretend nothing is wrong, especially since neither will bring up the other's recent change. Instead of talking they let the tension continue to grow._

"_Perhaps it is possible… we aren't compatible anymore…" Hotsuma lets his mind wander._

_Suddenly the air thickens like it did before and a barrier falls around Hotsuma, cutting him off from Shusei._

"_This isn't a barrier like Shusei's!" He says. With Shusei's barrier, he has the freedom to move in and out of it._

_In this one he is trapped._

…_._

_In a panic, Shusei instinctively calls out Hotsuma's name._

"_Hotsuma! Where are you!?" He uses his God's Eyes to try and find him. He tries to use his power but his mind hits a wall and he realizes a barrier must be shielding his presence from him._

"_Damn it…" He retraces his steps, hoping to find a clue as to where the barrier is set up, only then can he try to break it._

"_Only a high level Duras can do this!" Shusei is adept at creating barriers and breaking past them. For him to be blocked by one can only mean trouble._

_He continues his search and then he hears his voice._

"_Even with your God's Eyes you can't see, can you?"_

"_Hotsuma, where were you?"_

"_Where was I? You mean you couldn't hear? You didn't see the flames? It was another ambush! And where were you? Hiding out safely here?"_

"_No! There was a barrier!" Shusei yells, "Don't you dare pin this on me again! You know I'd never leave you in battle! Why do you keep doing this!"_

"_We just aren't working anymore are we? To be a Zweilt, we have to trust each other with our lives. It's a heavy burden but, I don't feel like I can trust you anymore…" Hotsuma says, "You've lost your will to fight."_

"_That's not true…not true at all." Shusei pleads._

_And then, Shusei's world goes black after he feels the wind get knocked out of him. He's unconscious before he hits the ground._

…_._

_Within the barrier, Hotsuma attempts to break out using the flames of his God's Voice._

"_Damn it! Not even a scratch!" _

_Barriers weren't his strong suit, that was always Shusei's area of expertise._

"_Where are you Shusei?"_

"_The brown haired Zweilt is easy to break isn't he?"_

"_Who are you? Where are you?" Hotsuma screams when he hears an unfamiliar voice._

"_He thinks so little of himself. I'd even say he is filled with self-loathing…"_

_The voice sounds like its coming from all directions within the barrier. Hotsuma conjures up flames in all directions to see if he can lure out the owner of the malicious voice._

"_People like him are easy to mess with. I can take a thought and twist it out of proportion and let his own mind run wild with that thought."_

"_Where is he?!" Flames erupt as he yells, "Don't you dare touch him!"_

"_I've been watching you two for a while now…"_

_That catches Hotsuma's attention. Those times he felt the hair on the back of his neck stand up. The feeling of being watched…_

"_It was you wasn't it?" Hotsuma asks, even though he knows the answer._

_The voice laughs, "Took you a while." _

"_Why don't you show yourself then, if you think so highly of yourself?" Hotsuma tries to entice the Duras out._

"_If you wish. Look behind you."_

_Hotsuma turns and sees Shusei standing behind him._

"_What the hell?" Hotsuma questions before being attacked by an onslaught of new duras._

_While swinging Masterstroke and taking out the duras, he kept making eye contact with the figure that claimed to be Shusei._

That's not Shusei….That's something else…

…_._

_The day passed quickly. Before he knew it, it was dusk. Clouds gathered overhead as if they knew the gruesome direction the day would take. Soon the clouds begin to gently roar as tiny rain droplets turn to a heavier rain. The sound of rain gradually fills the air, getting heavier and heavier._

_Shusei stands in a clearing, one that was a battlefield moments ago, full of anger, fear, and despair. To think, the one person you trusted the most in the world, would betray you and even learn to hate you, how can you move on? Especially when that person was all you had._

_He looks to the sky as if the rain pouring down would bring with it an answer. Instead it only blinds him. _

_The tall, elegant duras, Grave, was standing off to the side, laughing at the scene before him._

"_Tell me, Zweilt, how does it feel to be abandoned?"_

_Shusei ignores him, turning his attention toward the ground. _

"_Now that's rude, ignoring me." Grave laughs again. _

_Shusei, like a statue, doesn't move._

"_Now you're starting to irritate me." Grave growls, "Stand up."_

_The only sound came from the rain._

"_Stand up!" He yells again._

_After seeing that Shusei has yet to move, he summons two wolf like beasts to his side. The large beasts lock their gaze on to Shusei's slumped form, digging their claws into the ground ready to attack the minute their master gives the command. _

"_It doesn't matter anymore…" Shusei whispers to himself, forgetting Grave and his beasts where even nearby._

"_What was that?" Grave asks._

_Shusei shakes his head, lets out a sad laugh and braces himself for what is to come._

_The command the beasts have been waiting for comes as Grave lifts his hand in Shusei's direction. They charge and almost immediately their jaws lock around Shusei's throat and side._

_Shsuei only lets out a small yell, realizing physical agony wasn't nearly as painful as he had expected. This pain is nothing compared to the betrayal._

…_._

_After Hotsuma had finished off the last of the Duras, he hears a gurgling noise coming from one of the bodies._

"_Sure you should have left your partner alone for so long?" It laughs._

_Hotsuma whips his head around at the mention of Shusei, "What?"_

_The Duras just laughs, "You think Grave cares about Reiga or his plan? No, he's more simple than that…" The Duras coughs up blood, clearly losing strength. "He enjoys playing with humans, that's all… It's all a game to him…" The breaths were becoming ragged and he uses his last breath to deliver the ominous warning, "Your partner…I'd go find him…if I were you…" _

_Chills run up Hotsuma's spine._

What does he mean?

_He runs off to find Shusei._

…_.._

"_NO!"_

_Shusei can barely see anymore, but he doesn't need to see to recognize the voice._

"_Why did you come?" The words were no more than a whisper; he knew they wouldn't be heard. _

_I thought you had abandoned me…_

"_Shusei! Get up! Don't you dare die here!" A blond lifts his limp and damaged body into his lap, "I swear to God, I'll go to hell and drag you back myself!" _

Are those tears you're holding back?

"_Why?...How could you?..."_

"_It wasn't me! It was all a lie-" _

"_I still can't bring myself…to hate you…but-"_

"_Shusei! Listen! It's not what you think!" The blond screams earnestly._

_At this point it doesn't matter to Shusei, "I can't…I can't see you anymore."_

"_Shusei! Shusei, please!"_

_Shusei's head falls into the blond's chest. Everything went black and all sounds began to fade. But he wasn't scared. Death was all he wanted now. His release. There's no more suffering beyond death, or so he hopes. _

"_SHUSEI!"_

…

_A hand falls harshly on Hotsuma's shoulder, Takashiro's._

"_Quickly, give him to me." He says with almost no emotion._

_Hotsuma is to overcome by emotion to hear his words._

"_Hurry, or you won't ever see him again. The ritual, if it's done now, I can reincarnate him! " He quickly explains. _

_Hostuma hears the words but can't comprehend their meaning. His grip on Shusei is firm. He's looking at his partner but also seeing right through him._

"_Hotsuma!" Takashiro screams, trying to reach him, "His soul will be lost if you don't give him to me now!"_

_Blankly, Hotsuma looks up at the man and loosens his grip, "Please…be careful…" He pleads, "Bring him back to me…please…" Silent tears are falling down his face. _

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**Sorry if this is a little confusing, going back and forth between the two and Grave's inpersonation of them. I've been working on this chapter for so long I just had to stop at some point!  
**

**I just really wanted to get this up before my computer died again, so maybe in the future I'll go back and fix up any errors or typos.**

**FYI, my computer hasn't been working lately, so I'm not too sure when the next update will come. I don't even have the next chapter written out yet, but this story shouldn't be too much longer. I'm thinking maybe 2 or 3 more chapters. Thanks for sticking with me though! I really appreciate all the favs, reviews and follows. It means a lot especially since this is my first multi chapter story! **


	17. Chapter 17

**T_T sorry its sooo late...**

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17

"You son of a bitch," Hotsuma growled under his breath.

"What's the matter? Did your past not please you?" Grave teased.

Hotsuma spared a glance in Shusei's direction. Shusei was on all fours, staring at the ground. Hotsuma could see him mouthing some words but couldn't make any of it out.

"You okay over there?" he asked.

A slight glance was all he got in response.

"Come on, Shusei! Now isn't the time." He responded keeping both an eye on the Opast and his partner.

"He's so delicate isn't he?" Grave says casually while walking in their direction, "I mean he thinks you betrayed him and he falls apart." Grave laughs, "It's almost like it's your fault."

Hotsuma clenches his fists and tries to hold himself back from lunging at the duras. Instinctively, he knows how to fight from all the experience of his past lives, but it's always frighteningly new when you engage in the first battle of a new life. Especially against a foe as powerful as this one. Not to mention, he has someone to protect now, and that someone isn't exactly mentally stable now.

"You look like you want a fight." Grave says in a low voice, "But you hesitate."

Hotsuma stands his ground, "What? You think I am afraid of you?"

"Well…" Grave loosens the cuffs on his elegant jacket, "I'll make the first move then!"

Faster than Hotsuma can comprehend, the duras was behind him. When he finally turns around to face him, Grave had already moved behind him again. This time when Hotsuma faces him, he feels a blow to his stomach and falls back.

"Well if it's gonna be this easy, it won't be any fun. Hardly worth my time as a matter of fact." Grave says nonchalant.

Hotsuma stands up and braces himself again. He curses when he can't call upon Masterstroke, his swrod.

_Why?! Why can't I summon it?_

"Please try to make this entertaining." Grave's voice call Hostuma out of his fog.

Hotsuma charges the duras in a futile attempt to land a blow. But again, the duras moves faster than he can follow.

"What's wrong? The Zweilts are nothing compared to me, but this is like fighting an ant." He asks the blonde, "Perhaps…you need motivation?"

Hotsuma sees the Opast glance at Shusei, "Don't you even dare." He growls a warning.

"Oh?" Grave laughs at Hotsuma's threat.

Hotsuma's fists tighten as he sees Grave walk toward Shusei like he is a wolf and Shusei is wounded prey. But against the Opasts speed and callousness, what could he do? He feels his ring on his thumb and glances at it. The shimmering silver ring houses Hotsuma's weapon. He remembers how the Murasame siblings materialized out of thin air. He wonders if he has the strength to summon Masterstroke as he hasn't yet done so in this life. As he looks up again he sees Grave closing in on Shusei.

"Many years I have been hunting you two." Grave reminices, "You damned Zweilts…If you hadn't been in the way, Reiga would have accomplished his goal. But since he hasn't, I've been tied to him and under his control. And I am quite sick of it. Do I look like a slave? Finishing you two off will bring me one step closer to freedom."

Shusei realizing the danger he is in tries to back away in a futile attempt. The Opasts long and graceful strides always kept him within striking distance.

"I am nobody's servant!" Grave howled not to the Zweilts, but to Reiga, should he be listening. In his anger the Opast summoned a claymore and held it high above Shusei's head, "It's time you die for good this time."

In a panic, Hotsuma no longer has the time to think of a proper strategy and lunges toward Grave.

The next thing Hotsuma knows he is standing to his side, in between Shusei and Grave. He looks down and sees his sword, glistening red and white and with blood dripping off the end. In his panic he must have drawn upon the strength to summon it in order to save his partner. He doesn't question it, rather is grateful it just happened.

"How dare you…" Grave hissed as he holds his hand to his side in an attempt to stop the blood flow.

For the first time, Hotsuma sees a truly evil look on the duras's face. He knows the real fight will now begin and this time, Grave will hold nothing back.

"Shusei. Stand up." Hotsuma tells Shusei who's still in a daze. He looks behind him to see if he's done as ordered, "Come on. I can't do this alone."

"I'm sorry." He says as he staggers to his feet, "I don't know. If I can fight."

"Don't say stupid things," Hotsuma holds out his hand, "By the way, I think this is yours."

Shusei hesitantly holds out his hand and Hotsuma drops the small silver ring into his palm. He carefully studies it despite the current situation. He tries to remember all the secrets that come with this ring.

"You know what to do with that."

Shusei nods and slips the ring onto his right index finger.

"Well isn't that cute? Too bad you're both already dead!" Grave interrupts.

"Like hell we are! It's time you pay for all you've done!" Hotsuma yells.

Trying to get his head into the battle, Shusei throws aside all the thoughts and memories of the past aside. While there is still so much he doesn't understand and too many puzzle pieces that need to be put together he knows that by getting rid of Grave, he may have a future, "I can't believe I was foolish enough to fall for your schemes." He whispers.

"He fooled us all, don't blame yourself." Hotsuma reassures him.

Blood still dripping from his side, Grave wields his claymore in an offensive position and readies for an attack, "Don't think you two can do any real damage to me? You may have the memories and instincts of warriors but these two physical bodies are no match for me!"

He throws himself at the two Zweilts, his first target: Hotsuma, for revenger for before. Hotsuma narrowly dodges the blow and uses Masterstroke to block the second attack.

Despite taking the current onslaught of attacks, Hotsuma looks over to find Shusei. And he sees him standing there, two blades in hand."

In disbelief he asks, "How did you manage to summon your two swords so soon?!"

"It was easy, no?" Shusei shrugs his shoulders.

"You've got to be kidding me…" Hotsuma pushes against Grave's claymore with his sword pushing him back and gaining some distance.

Shusei comes up beside him, "What should we do?"

"Pretty sure you're the one who comes up with ideas, Shusei."

"Like I'll stand by and give you two time to think? This isn't a movie, this is real life and your enemy's won't sit idly by!" Grave came in again sweeping his sword left to right in an attempt to knock the pair down.

The two stepped back in time to avoid another attack but weren't given much time to regain their footing before Grave started another onslaught.

The most the Zweilt pair could manage was to evade his attacks and they both knew they would run out of energy soon.

"Damn, he's fast." Hotsuma stated the obvious.

"A real trial by fire. How can we win?" Shusei says, "This is quite the first battle." Shusei leans on his knees to catch his breath.

"See? I told you, you don't eat well enough!" Hostuma says.

"Is this really the time for that?" Shusei quips back.

"What do we do?"

"He doesn't leave room for an opening to strike. Perhaps we can get him from both sides?"

"Let's do it, " Hotsuma braces himself.

As Grave comes at the swinging again, each Zweilt takes a side ready to launch an attack at the same time. AS the Opasts is caught between the two, they both strike at the same time, but Grave manages to twist his body enough to avoid a lethal blow.

"I see your starting to work like one. Not bad, but far from good." Grave smirks.

The wounds were merely superficial. The pair decides to not try the same tactic again given that Grave probably won't fall for it.

Suddenly the barrier they had been in begins to crumble. Grave stares up in disgust at seeing it fall apart.

"What is going on?" He looks at the pair, "No way you two could manage this."

A gun shot rings out and Grave jumps back avoiding the bullet, "Hmph, back up?" He says

Hotsuma turns around in surprise, "Tsukumo?"

"Hey, I'm here too, ya know!" His sister Toko says.

Hotsuma sighs in relief. He looks at Shusei who is clearly on the verge of passing out.

"Glad you could make it to the party." Hotsuma says to the siblings.

"Hmph, more Zweilt's to destroy." Grave says like their appearance means nothing, "Nothing more than chew toys for my pets." He says as he summons two demonic wolves to his side. Their appearance causes a shiver to run down Shusei's spine.

Hotsuma places himself between Shusei and their foes, "You okay?"

"I will be," Shusei stands, bracing himself on his knees, "I won't let him win again."

"Damn right." Hotsuma agrees, "Lets end this for good."

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**Apologies for the long wait! (Again…) **

**I also just heard Hotaru Odagiri is drawing for Uraboku again! So exciting! Can't wait to finally be reading Uraboku again !**


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